Heavy In Your Arms
by behindabruise
Summary: Someone comes to Mystic Falls, threatening Elena. So, Damon takes her on a road trip across the country to avoid the threat, just him and her, leaving Stefan behind. What crazy things could they get into? And what could they find in each other? DELENA xx
1. Prologue

_Name::_ Heavy In Your Arms

_Fandom::_ The Vampire Diaries

_Pairing::_ Damon/Elena, Elena/Stefan

_Specifications:: _Alternative Universe (**BEFORE SEASON FINALE**)

_Rating::_ M – lemons/limes, graphic violence and language

_Warnings::_ This story is **NOT** FOR **STEFAN FANS**!

_Summary:: _Damon and Elena both harbor feelings for each other, but can't seem to admit them to the other. But everything changes when someone blows into town, threatening Elena. Damon is forced to take Elena on the road, leaving Stefan behind. What could spark between the two while Stefan isn't there?

* * *

I love Stefan. I love _Stefan_.

And I did honestly believe that.

Stefan was kind. He was gentle and he cared for others. He was sweet, a gentleman. He loved _me_. He would walk through fire for me. I knew I was the reason he breathed. He'd told me so, on many occasions. I was everything to him.

But Damon. _Damon_. Damon was so mean and cruel. He didn't have very many redeeming qualities. He hurt people. He had no cares for human life. He didn't care about the people he killed. Damon was a monster. But somewhere along the lines, I must have found something in him worth saving. I must have found at least one redeeming quality, just one little ounce of humanity in him . . . or I wouldn't feel this way.

I love _Stefan._

Damon was so arrogant. And he hated his brother. The bad blood between them was inconceivable, running back more than one hundred and fifty years. But Damon was sure of himself. And he was alone . . . he didn't have anyone. And maybe it was Katherine who made his personality so volatile, so angry and hurtful. It was she who made him shut out his feelings, also shutting out his humanity. She caused him to believe that human life was trivial, that it meant nothing. It was Katherine's fault entirely.

But that didn't change the fact that Damon was like that. A century ago, he may have been as kind-hearted as his brother. But now, he was mean and spiteful, only caring for himself.

But he was only looking for acceptance . . . I saw that in him. He wanted acceptance from his family, his brother, the people he had hurt because he had never received acceptance during his life as a human. But it was too late for that. He had done too much damage; he couldn't be accepted by anyone, not even Stefan, at that point. Who would let such a monster into their life? Who would be so stupid? Who would accept Damon, only allowing him to destroy everything with his undying ability to murder the things that he loved most?

No one would accept Damon. No one would dare to let such a creature in.

But . . . he was only searching for a home, a place to be.

From downstairs, I heard Jenna calling to her, "Elena! Stefan is here."

I slammed my diary shut and shoved it under my mattress. I couldn't have Stefan seeing what I'd written about his brother.

Stefan entered the room swiftly, at a faster speed than any human, and kissed me abruptly. I kissed back, trying to prove that I loved him, I loved _Stefan _the most.

He pulled back and smiled at me. But there was worry in his eyes. I gazed into them deeply, searching for an explanation as to why he seemed so uneasy. I found nothing.

There was definitely something wrong. "What is it, Stefan?" I asked him.

He sighed and his charming smile disappeared. "Elena, I have to tell you something."

I paced around the parlor, looking at the antique books that sat in the bookcases that surrounded the room, watching them gather dust. I surveyed the books, reading their spines. Some were so old, that their names had been scratched off. I passed the shelves at least a hundred times each, thinking, and then thinking again.

Elena . . . How could I feel this way about her? I hadn't felt so enamored since Katherine. Was it because Elena and Katherine looked so alike that I felt this way for her? Was it my old feelings for Katherine surfacing again? But Elena was nothing like Katherine. Elena was warm and sweet instead of cold and cruel. Katherine had no care for human life or even other vampires. She didn't care for anyone but herself, which included Stefan and I. She was a selfish, cold-hearted bitch.

But Elena wasn't like that in the least. Elena cared for everyone. She even cared for me, after everything I'd intentionally put her and Stefan through. She saw something . . . something human in me. Something I didn't even see myself until I realized she thought I was worth saving. She thought I was worth it, as much as she thought Stefan was worth it, and she loved Stefan too much for her own good.

Stefan . . . yes, the matter of Stefan. I promised him an eternity of hell, but now that Elena knew there was some good in me, I now couldn't fulfill that promise. I didn't feel very guilty about stealing his girl, but I couldn't torment him like I use to. I didn't even _want_ to anymore. What had this girl done to me? She'd changed me completely, it seemed, back the way I was when I was still human. She was making me kind and considerate, caring about others, not just myself. Elena was changing me, as Katherine had. This time it seemed though that Elena was changing me into a good person instead of an evil one. And for so long, I'd wondered what it would be like to be _good_ again. Would I start eating bunnies like Stefan, instead of the rich blood of humans? The idea of goodness seemed so odd, so foreign, and I wasn't too keen on it.

But it was then I realized: I would change for Elena. Hell, I'd do anything for that girl. But why did I feel that way?

I grabbed a glass and filled it with the first bottle of liquor I could grab. I poured it down my throat without hesitation. Scotch. So bitter. But it soothed my qualms about Elena. I began pacing the parlor, reading the spines of the aged books once more.

Suddenly the front door was yanked open, and I turned to see Elena storm in, looking as petrified as ever. Stefan was behind her, stoic as always. I turned my attention to Elena.

"What happened?" I asked, trying to sound concerned.

Elena paused and looked up at Stefan. I glanced from Stefan to Elena, and then Stefan again. Stefan sighed and answered, "Damon, we have a huge problem."

**PLEASEEEE review. It's my first TVD fic, so I'd like to know how I did on the prologue. Next chapter will be coming up TOMORROW, so get ready!**


	2. The Getaway

**Yes, the next chapter, as I promised, the very next day. I'm kind of excited for this story, so I hope you're enjoying it(: And thank you for the lovely reviews! I appreciate them a lot. I feel like that was a very good number to start with, but I'd like more as I continue on with the story. Thanks, guys(:**

_I was a heavy heart to carry . . . My beloved was weighed down . . . My arms around his neck . . . My fingers laced a crown . . ._

"Damon, Katherine is back. I spotted her in the woods as I was hunting. I came upon her, her back was turned to me. She whipped around and when she saw it was me, she ran away. I couldn't keep up with her, so I went to Elena's as fast as I could," Stefan said.

Damon seemed unmoved. His face was frozen in the mask of concern. I became worried until he snapped and hissed under his breath, "Bitch." He ran his fingers through his hair and then cried, "Well what are we going to do, Stefan? _Fight_ her? She's too powerful for us. And as soon as she sees Elena –" he glanced at me, worried "– she'll kill her."

"I know that."

"Then what are you going to do, Stefan? She'll be here any minute. She knows where we are." Anger seemed rise in Damon's voice as he realized how dangerous this was.

I looked up at Stefan, whose jaw was clamped down tightly; I could see the muscles. "What are we going to do?" I asked in a small voice. He turned to look at me, fear in his eyes. Seeing Stefan fearful made me even more fearful.

And yes, I was very fearful. Katherine . . . Katherine would want what she had so long ago. She'd want them back, as if she owned them. Damon was right: she'd kill me in a second once she learned both of the brothers were cured of the heartbreak, and that Stefan's cure was due to _me_. She'd kill me in less than heartbeat. She'd attack me, rip my throat out and enjoy the blood that gushed from the open wound, all why Damon and Stefan watched. She would relish in it.

Katherine was insanely powerful, and insanely selfish. She would get what she wanted, and what she wanted were the Salvatore brothers. Why else would she be back in Mystic Falls after all this time? And surely, when she saw that Stefan and I were in love, that she was forgotten, she would have her way as she always did, and kill me.

There was silence between the brothers. "She'll kill me, wont she, Stefan?" I whispered, breaking the silence.

Stefan turned to me, a pained look in his face. His mouth twisted and he nodded. I looked down at my feet.

"Well we can't just _stand _here, we have no idea when she'll arrive!" Damon shouted angrily.

"Damon is right, we have to do something, Stefan," I agreed.

Stefan nodded. "Alright. I'll stay here. Damon, I want you to take Elena as far away from Mystic Falls as you can."

Damon and I exchanged glances. "Stefan, can't I go with you?"

"No. Damon will kill Katherine as soon as he gets the chance, even though she's much too powerful to be killed by only Damon. I can lead her differently, keep her in the dark until you're too safety, Elena."

Damon shrugged, agreeing. "It's probably better that you take care of it, Stefan. I'd be too murderous, and God knows I'd be defeated so easily by Katherine." It was obvious from Damon's tone that he was trying to convince Stefan to go along with the plan, even if Damon did believe he could kill Katherine.

I knew he angle. He was trying to be with me, Stefan out of the picture. It was a move Damon would pull, though I was sure it was for nothing more than just sex or to piss of Stefan. Damon didn't have feelings for me. He wouldn't, ever. He was too selfish. He didn't have the emotional capacity to have strong feelings for someone other than lust. Of this, I was almost absolutely sure.

Stefan stared regretfully to Damon. "It's the only thing I can think to do. I'll take Elena home and help her get packed. Damon, pack or something and then get the car."

Stefan grasped my hand and pulled me to the door. I realized I'd been staring at Damon intently once I was torn away from him.

Stefan jumped in his car and drove to my house. He clenched the wheel tightly, his knuckles turning red, and then white. I watched him nervously. He didn't seem to notice me at all.

When we arrived at my house, he hopped out and ran at his vampire speed up to my room. When I caught up with him, I found him in my room, throwing things into an open suitcase at a blinding pace. He was only a blur as he dashed from my dresser to the suitcase on my bed, which was rapidly filling with random articles of clothing.

"Stefan!" I said sternly. But he didn't stop whirling around the room. "_Stefan_! Please! You don't have to pack me."

Stefan's blur came to me and when I blinked he was staring into my eyes, grasping my face. "Elena, this is serious. You need to get out of Mystic Falls as soon as possible."

"I know it's serious. Why can't you drive me?"

"I don't trust Damon here, leaving him to get rid of Katherine. He's not nearly as powerful as he thinks he is, and Katherine could wipe him out in a second if he took her on."

"But you trust him to safely drive me across the country?" I sounded so disbelieving, so untrusting of Damon. I felt a pang of guilt inside me, but tried to ignore it. There was no reason for me to feel guilty.

"Damon brought you to Georgia and back in one piece. Though there are risks, it more of a risk that Damon stay here and get killed by Katherine, leaving her to chase us across the country."

"But . . . what if we don't _see _each other again, Stefan?" This question had been gnawing at me. When I finally asked, more guilt arose in my heart like smoke, traveling into my eyes, where they watered, watching Stefan's reaction curiously.

Stefan stared for a while, unmoving. Then, as if a stone sculpture moved for the first time, he shook his head. "Nothing will happen to me. I'll keep Katherine at bay until she gets tired of the game and returns to wherever she came from."

"What if you can't hold her off? What if she never gets tired of the game?" I felt my voice crack.

"Nothing will happen."

I hastily pulled the moisture that had gathered in the corners of my eyes back, and zipped up the suitcase. Stefan carried it downstairs and into the car, where we drove off, back to the Salvatore home.

* * *

Elena and I, alone, in a car with nothing but miles and miles of road ahead of us. It sounded like a nice deal. The only worrying part was my feelings. I was overjoyed. Though Katherine could kill any of us in a second, I couldn't help feeling absolutely jubilant. Alone, with Elena, and no Stefan. It sounded like something I would dream about in a million years. Maybe, I could work my exact feelings for Elena. Maybe, I could change, and she would see it, and accept my feelings and me . . .

I zipped up a duffel bag I had stuffed with black clothing items, and threw it into the trunk of my 60's Chevrolet Camaro just as Elena and Stefan were pulling up.

Elena stepped out of the car and slammed the door shut. She seemed slightly frustrated. I smiled crookedly and asked her, "Well I'm ready to go. What about you?"

Stefan came around with her luggage. "Oh, a bellboy!" I teased. Stefan threw me a dirty look and Elena furrowed her brow and crossed her arms over her chest.

As soon as the luggage was packed away, I started the car. "Are we going or what?" Elena and Stefan turned to each other. I groaned. Sentimental goodbyes are maddening.

"I love you," Elena whispered, her face close to Stefan's.

He smiled half-heartedly and whispered back, "I love you, too."

Sickening. They kissed for a good five minutes. When I was sure it was going to come to fuck in another five minutes, I honked the horn loudly and smiled widely when they jumped. "Gas is a-wasting, can we get on the road already?" I asked, impatient.

Elena rolled her eyes disapprovingly, and Stefan threw me another dirty look. They embraced and then Stefan held the door open for Elena, and she climbed in. He closed the door. He had a truly pained look upon his face, being even more brooding than he was before. "Be safe, Elena. And Damon, please, don't do anything stupid. Don't do anything you'll regret. Get out as soon as you can. Go as far and fast as you can." I nodded seriously, and he nodded back. "I love you, Elena. Please, be safe." She nodded and they kissed again. I secretly rolled my eyes.

I stomped on the pedal, and we backed out of the driveway, onto the street. Stefan stayed perfectly still where we'd left him. Elena kept looking back until he was out of sight.

* * *

I love Stefan. I'd told myself this was true multiple times. But as said our goodbyes, whispering sweet nothings to each other, I didn't feel as worried or as upset about leaving him as I would expect. There was even a slight bit of _eagerness_. But what could I be eager for? To be killed by Katherine? To be away from my boyfriend?

_To be with Damon._

I couldn't catch myself quick enough. I knew that I would say that, I was just hoping I wouldn't. But to be with Damon? What kind of person would look forward to that? Damon was smug, and complicated, and liked to piss off the people around him. Who would be eager to be around that for weeks, as they traveled across the country with him?

I laid my head back on the seat and placed my hand over my forehead, as if I had a fever. I glanced out of the window and watched the trees past by at a blinding speed. I sighed, and turned myself toward the window, and away from Damon.

"I'm excited for this trip too," Damon said, mocking my lack of enthusiasm to be near him.

I shook my head. "I don't know," I murmured.

"What don't you know?" I didn't answer. "Is it Stefan?" I still didn't answer. He chuckled. "Are you _ignoring_ me? Am I really that unbearable? I thought we were getting along quite well before this little incident occurred. What's changed?"

So much.

"Nothing, Damon. We make a great team." It was sort of a lie. And it wasn't told like a truth.

"That doesn't sound very convincing."

I never answered. I just curled up and watched the trees and neighboring cars pass by as we sped along.

How could I feel this way about Damon? Wanting to be around him, that was one thing. But not caring about leaving Stefan as if it was the last time I'd see him . . . that was criminal. Damon had done something. Or maybe I did something. Either way, I couldn't fathom the way I was feeling about Damon. My stomach was even fluttering as he drove, staring intently at the road, being a cautious driver. How could my stomach flutter? It was Damon, for crying out loud. _Damon_! The manipulative, smug, arrogant bastard. How could I feel anything for him but disgust, or maybe pity, if he was lucky?

I knew he wasn't as mean as he appeared and that he wanted more than to just be a killing machine, but he was still so cruel and evil. The past was still there. I knew what he'd done to people. I did feel a bit of pity for him. But that was too much. I couldn't let that pity allow me to feel . . . other things for Damon. That was stupid that was crazy.

Yet throughout the car ride out of Virginia, I found myself begging to steal a glance at Damon.

**Sorry there are any grammar slip-ups or something towards the end. I was slightly distracted as I was writing that bit. It's a hard-knock life.**

**I kid. Please Review. 'Tis very important you review! I've gotten many hits and I appreciate that, but please review. Hits are great, but so are reviews. Just be doubly, great, huh?**


	3. To Dream

**So while it is raining outside, I shall write some more! He-yah, onward.**

_I was a heavy heart to carry . . . My feet dragged across ground . . . And he took me to the river . . . Where he slowly let me drown . . ._

That night, Damon and I arrived in a small town in North Carolina called Cashiers. It was a kitschy town, mostly for tourists, I supposed. Damon found a small motel. They were all booked up except for one, small room, with only one bed.

My stomach did a flip.

I'd have to share a bed with _Damon_. This was not helping whatever feelings I was trying to suppress.

I sat in the car as Damon moved the luggage, curled up in a ball. I was tired: my emotions had plagued me on this day, and I was too tired to even think about what Damon would try to pull if we were in the same bed, just to piss off his younger brother.

I breathed in and ran my fingers through my hair. In a flash, Damon was at the rolled-down window. I jumped slightly, scared of his sudden appearance beside me.

We didn't say anything. I eyed him as he searched my face. Finally, he said softly, "Elena, please go up to the room?" I still didn't move. When he opened the car door after a few moments, I hesitated before stepping out into the night's cold wind.

I shivered as the wind hit me, and folded my arms around myself, trying to conserve heat. Damon eyed me, and I could see the fret as he watched me shake like a leave in the wind. He took off his leather jacket and wrapped it around my shoulders. I looked at him, skeptical. He looked back, stony, as if the gesture meant nothing.

I grasped the jacket, trying to enclose it around my body. I wasn't dressed to be prepared for this cold mountain air.

Damon showed me to the room. It wasn't very nice. There was one bed, fit for two people, with a threadbare carpet beneath it, a dirty mirror across from it, and a bathroom door on the opposite wall. My brow crinkled as I first beheld the motel room. It wasn't like I was expecting very much, but _still_ – this room was very cramped.

Damon acted almost _bashful_. "It was the only room they had," he explained without even a hint of mocking in his voice.

"Oh," was all I could think to say.

"I won't look while you change," he replied, sounding human, not at all like his usual self. I liked it when he acted this way. But I couldn't let that change anything.

He sat on the edge of the bed and looked out of the motel window that overlooked the parking lot and distant mountains. I unzipped my suitcase, keeping an eye on Damon, expecting him to try to sneak a peek suddenly at any moment. But he didn't. As I lifted my red shirt over my head and replaced it with a black tank top. I felt my cheeks flush when I realized how exposed I must have been in only a white bra. After that, I felt more trusting of Damon. I took my jeans off, only making sure Damon wasn't watching twice. I put on a pair of sweatpants, threw my leftover clothes in the bag, and zipped it up again. When Damon heard the zipper, he turned around again and smiled politely. I smiled back. Slightly. Only slightly.

"So," I said. I put my back to the mirror and looked at the lone bed. "Only one bed?"

"It's the only room they had," Damon repeated. Again, there wasn't even a hint of mocking in his voice. I nodded and crossed my arms over my chest. "You know, I'm going to just stay in the car?"

I looked at him. "_Really?_"

"Well, I was thinking of hunting. Go up, find some people camping. So I'm not too hungry tomorrow."

"But you and Stefan sleep, don't you?"

He nodded. "Yes, my body operates like a human's as long as I drink enough blood. But we don't depend on blood like humans do. It's not nearly as much as a necessity for vampires."

I looked at him with disbelief. Damon was being . . . selfless? "So you're going to sleep in your car?"

He shrugged. "Sure. I don't mind."

I chuckled under my breath, though it was without mirth completely. I couldn't believe I was actually witnessing Damon give up a bed for _me_. It must've been a ploy to piss of Stefan, I figured. But if he really wanted to damage Stefan, he'd sleep in the bed with me. It didn't quite make sense. I couldn't think of anything except for, "Oh. Thank you then, Damon." I smiled, very pleasantly surprised. Maybe Damon wasn't just a monster after all. Maybe there was something below the surface . . .

I shook my head, trying to shake the notion. He was still cruel. Just because he was being selfless toward me did not mean he would stop being a monster, stop hurt other people. He still only cared for himself. But he singled me out, I couldn't comprehend.

"You seem very surprised," he said, back to sounding as coy as ever. He smiled, and I felt my heart skip a beat, though I pretended it didn't.

"I am. Thanks, Damon," I replied, smiling slightly. I sounded very distracted. And I was.

He rose from the bed and opened the door. "I'll be here in the morning to get you. We're going to start early."

I nodded, and Damon left.

* * *

I hated that girl. I hated Elena.

But at the same time, I felt the very opposite of hate. I felt a strong sense rise in me. And it caused me to do the very thing I hated Elena for: she made me wish I were a better man.

But I couldn't be a better man. I could only trust myself. I couldn't be dependent on others. I had a shell for a reason. I couldn't even trust Elena – I knew what she did to me. She teamed up with Stefan behind my back in an attempt to stop me from opening the tomb. I remember that night clearly. I felt like my heart had been ripped out of my chest. I'd let my guard down for Elena because I thought she was trustworthy. It didn't turn out the way I'd hoped for though. She was just as untrustworthy as the rest of them, and I had felt so stupid for allowing her my trust.

I ran into the woods. I perked my ears, searching for human voices, someone camping out. I continued on, listening closely.

I'd sacrificed something for Elena just now. I hadn't even watched her change, something I'd do to make Stefan angry. But I couldn't bring myself to it. And I let her have the room to herself. I was been so _generous_, it wasn't like me. It wasn't like Stefan even mattered anymore either. All I thought about was Elena, instead of ways I could anger Stefan using Elena. I wasn't quite sure who this changing man was, but I couldn't allow myself to continue on with it. But, maybe, if I did change as Elena was making me, she would learn to love me, and maybe, just maybe . . .

No. I brushed the thought away.

I continued further into the woods. Suddenly a burst of laughter erupted from the left of me, maybe five miles that way. I ran in that direction as the voices became more clearly. There was a man and a women. They were camping, talking about a recent trip to visit the woman's family. I rolled my eyes and continued forward.

I came upon there little campsite. There was a crackling campfire and a little tent. The man and woman were huddled together by the fire, trying to keep warm in the cold mountain night air. They seemed very happy together. I even felt twinge of guilt for killing them. What had Elena done to me? I stuffed it down, ignoring it completely. I didn't even want to make the hunt interesting. Instead, I wanted to kill them and be done. It wasn't very like me, but I tried to ignore it the best I could.

"John, I'm glad we're doing this. It's very intimate," the girl said in a soft voice.

John smiled and replied, "That's why I took you here, Marisa. Let me get something from the tent. Hold on." A condom, no doubt.

Marisa smiled and John rose, and walked several feet toward the tent. I shot out of the forest, grabbing him. There was a rustle as I plunged back into the forest on the other side of the campground. My mouth was clamped down tightly on John's mouth. His eyes stared at me, transfixed with fear. He tried to break free from my iron clasp around him, but he couldn't get out. I smiled to taunt him, and yanked his head back. He tried to scream behind my hand. I plunged my teeth into his neck, tearing into his skin. I drank to blood that streamed out of the punctures steadily.

When I was sure he was completely drained, I dropped him. Then I heard leaves rustle and a voice behind me, saying, "John? Is that you? What are you doing back –" I lunged at her. She screamed, but I quickly silenced her with my hand. I sunk my teeth into her skin, and sucked her dry. Her eyes were as frightened as John's.

When I was done feeding, I wiped my mouth on my sleeve and looked at the two bodies, and then at the fire's orange glow as it penetrated the woods. I dragged the two bodies back to the campsite and roasted their bodies individually, watching them burn and then turn to ash. The smell was horrible, but bearable still.

I was done with my snack, and felt full and satisfied. Of course, hunger would strike me again later, but it was nice to enjoy to contentment of a full stomach for once.

I sat down where John and Marisa had sat right before I killed them. I watched the orange embers of the fire, watching the rise up into the sky before they were shaken by the frigidity of night. The smoke curled into the air like ashen ribbons. I decided to douse the fire out. I searched through John and Marisa's tent and found too canteens filled with water. I used them both to put them fire out.

After I was done, I ran out of the forest and back to the motel. I retired to the car, bitterly regretting not being in a room. After an hour of tossing and turning in the leathery seats of the car, I decided there was no use. I got out and stretched my back. In a moment of chance, I glanced up at the door that held Elena inside. I wasn't sure why it was so beckoning, so inviting. Maybe it was because I was freezing outside. Or I wanted to slip into that bed. Whatever the reason, I decided to go with the current that was pulling me inside the room.

It was dark inside. I saw the silhouette of Elena's sleeping body in the darkness. I remembered a night like this before: I had slipped into Elena's room back in Mystic Falls, desperate to see the face of Katherine at the time. Now, it was desperate to see Elena's face. I remembered running a finger along her cheek, stroking her smooth skin.

Elena's back was to the door, to me. I didn't close the door, but instead kept it open as I silently glided to the other side of the bed. At first, her face was hard to make out. But as my eyes adjusted, I could better see her sleeping face, sweet and peaceful.

* * *

I remember falling asleep quickly. I didn't have very much of a dream – I was with Damon and he was taking me into the woods. I never asked him where we were going, but it appeared that he didn't know either. Suddenly, a gust of wind smacked us, and I found myself shivering in and out of sleep, vaguely wondering in my sleepy mind if the AC had broken or something. My eyes groggily opened and closed, and I could feel myself burrowing deeper into the sheets. Once, when I was my most conscious, I thought I saw someone sitting there, watching. I wanted to say something, but I wasn't sure if I could. My hooded eyes slapped shut again, and I nestled deeper into comforter.

* * *

I was watching Elena, as quiet as I could be. I didn't even move, and I tried my best not to breathe. But it must have been the coldness of the night as it entered the motel room through the open door because Elena began to stir often. She would groan and pull the comforter over her bare shoulders. After some time, she even began to open and close her eyes. I was quite she wasn't seeing anything when she did, until she nearly sat up in bed, stared at me for a good while and said, "Damon?"

This scared me. How could she know it was me? I wasn't manipulating her dreams, as I had once before. But she soon dropped down and hid under the quilt again.

Had she been dreaming of me? Was she thinking of me? It wasn't like her sleeping conscious was aware I'd been with her all day – it was asleep! Things were different when you slept. How could she know that it was me? And it wasn't like I had been inside her head. It was too dark to see . . . the only explanation was that she'd been dreaming of me. Elena, dreaming of Damon? It seemed out of place. Surely she would dream of Stefan, her only love. But no, she was . . . dreaming of me. The brother she wasn't suppose to dream of.

I left after she had said my name. The need to say goodbye in some way was too great, so I stroked her hair and then left quickly, before she could awake and see me there.

I returned the car. I willed myself to sleep, and found myself going in and out of slumber. One minute, it would be dark and then the sun was coming up over the mountains in the distant. I checked the clock on the car dashboard, and it declared in was 6:54. I had been shooting for seven o'clock. I dressed in a black shirt and blue jeans before I went up to Elena's room again.

She was buried deep in the quilt when I found her. She looked as peaceful as I'd left her. I was nervous to wake her. But I knew how.

"Alright, time to _wake up_, Elena!" I yelled. Elena jumped and shot up in bed. She looked up at me as I adjusted my leather jacket. "Come on, we have to get on the road!"

She nodded. "I'll be out in ten minutes."

I glanced skeptically and stepped out. Ten minutes later, Elena stepped out too. I leaned against the hood of my car, watching her as she came toward me. She was talking on the phone. From what I could understand, she was talking to Stefan.

"Yeah. Has she showed up yet?" she asked as she tried to open the trunk of the car. I did it for her, and lifted her suitcase in.

On the other end of the phone, Stefan answered, "Yes. I saw her at the Mystic Grill, yesterday. She wasn't inside, but she was behind it. I don't know what she was doing there. She might have been looking for you. I didn't show myself to her, and she left a little after I got there."

"What are you going to do when she comes to see you?"

"I don't know. Act normal, I suppose. But she knows about you. I can only imagine that Isobel has told her."

"I wish you were here, Stefan." I rolled my eyes. There was stab of jealousy, but I didn't regard it.

"I know. Damon will take care of you. I'll see as soon as possible."

"Love you."

"I love you too."

Elena hung up. "Let's go," she said to me, stuffing her phone into her jean pocket.

I gauged her expression. She seemed a bit upset about Stefan, but not toward me. She must not have known about me in her room last night, as I had suspected. I shrugged and got into the car.

Elena got in the passenger street, and we drove away.

**I like this chapter. I got to get into Damon's head. I got to see him hunt and see him change because of Elena. It was good. Did y'all like it? If you did, please leave a review and tell me(:**


	4. So Many Things

*****THIS IS A REPLACEMENT OF CHAPTE 4. IT HAS THE SAME CONTENT. THERE WAS SOME TEXT CONFUSION WITH THE WEBSITE. I APOLOGIZE!**

**Sorry it's been sort of . . . slow. But things are going to start picking up, I swear. (:**

**REVIEW! **

_My love has concrete feet . . . My love's an iron ball . . . Wrapped around your ankles . . . Over the waterfall . . ._

On the road, I began to sort of forget about Stefan back in Mystic Falls. Damon was very good with distractions.

"Okay. So what you're saying is that the 60's were better than the 80's?" Damon asked with incredulity.

I laughed, "Yes! The 60's definitely had better music."

"What? You don't like Guns N' Roses? Bon Jovi? Aerosmith? Van Halen? _U2_?"

"I mean they're okay –"

"I've seen U2 in concert twice. Van Halen once. And Bon Jovi, once, I think. They're all amazing though."

"But think of all the 60's music! The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, The Who, The Kinks, Simon & Garfunkel!"

"Yeah, I mean they're pretty great and made history and all, I've seen of all the live at least once –"

"You've seen The Beatles live?"

"Yeah, Shea Stadium. And I was at Woodstock."

"I am so jealous."

"Well you should be. I'm eternally gorgeous and I've been there, done that. I've seen history being made."

I giggled. Damon smiled.

We hadn't gotten very far yesterday, just to southern North Carolina. Damon promised that we were going to go very far today, down to Georgia and into Florida. We'd try to get onto I-10 and drive up to California over a series of a days after. We'd eventually stop near the border. We'd wait there until it was safe to return to Mystic Falls.

Jenna believed I was on a road trip with Stefan, just Stefan. Before leaving, I promised her that there was no one else. I wasn't taking Bonnie or Caroline. I remember her narrowing her eyes. And then I mentioned that Damon wasn't going either, the biggest lie, and her eyes cleared. She smiled and said alright, as long as I called. And then I remembered that I should probably call Jenna.

I took my phone out of my pocket and dialed her number. Damon watched me curiously, throwing his gaze back at the road every now and then as he watched me try to reach Jenna.

After two rings, she picked up, "Hello?"

"Jenna, hi, it's me. You told me to call while I was on the road, so I am," I answered, trying to sound genuine.

"Hi! Yeah, so how and you and Stefan?" In the corner of my eyes, I saw Damon's jaw tighten.

"We're really great. We're driving through South Carolina right now. We're going to try to make it to Florida. Maybe go to the beach or something if we get there," I lied. I didn't want Jenna thinking I was going too far and get suspicious.

"That's great. You always loved the beach!"

"Yeah, it'll be fun."

"Okay well everything at home is fine. Thanks for checking in."

"Of course. I'll call tomorrow too. Bye."

"Bye."

I ended the phone call and placed the phone beside me. There was a moment of silence in the car and I turned to look at Damon, who seemed very concentrated on driving. When he noticed me staring, he turned to look back at me and said, "What?"

"Nothing."

Another pause. "You told Jenna you were going with Stefan?"

"Yes. She wouldn't want me going with you."

"Why not? Your aunt loves me."

"But she thinks you're dangerous."

"Well I am dangerous."

A silence. Then I spoke, trying to seem steady and unafraid, "Damon, you're not going to hurt me, are you? I'm wearing vervain."

He looked at me, so shocked and insulted that I had to look away. After a moment, Damon snorted mirthlessly, and said, clearly offended, "Elena, I wouldn't hurt you."

I looked up at him, but he had turned his eyes back to the road. I fiddled with the silver necklace that hung around my neck. It was the vervain necklace Stefan had given me.

* * *

While it was true, I shouldn't have said it. Maybe I should have teased, been sarcastic and said something like, "Of course, Elena. I'm going to rip you to shreds."

But no, I was soft and told her I'd never hurt her. If she didn't suspect anything earlier with all of my kind gestures, she sure as hell was now. What in that girl caused me to act this way? It wasn't in my nature to change, to care, to _trust_. Yet, I found myself doing all of that ever since I'd been stuck with Elena. I was changing because of her, I was beginning to care for her deeply, and above all, I trusted her. Who had I become? I would never trust someone who had betrayed me before, as she had. Who in their right mind would? However, I could see that I trusted her and only her. I trust no one _but _her, and I didn't understand why.

After a long time of driving and talking about trivial things, we arrived in Florida. We stopped in Pensacola, and pulled up to a bar. It was the early evening, and the sun was just beginning to set, casting shades of purple, orange, and pink over the clouds.

Elena stepped out of the car and slammed the door behind her, staring up at the bar's sign: Beach Dog. She looked at me and asked, "What are we doing here?"

I shrugged my leather jacket off; it was scorching down in Florida. "Well, it's the evening, you and I are both tired and need to stretch our legs, and _I _need a drink."

"Have you been here before?"

"Once. It was on my way to New Orleans during a road trip in '74. That was a fun night."

"New Orleans?"

"Great city. We can stop there along the way, we're going to drive right through it. Sort of." Elena folded her arms over her chest. I could see she was skeptical about this place as her eyes glanced from me to the sign above the door and then to me again. I sighed, frustrated. "Come on, Elena! We might as well have some fun in between driving, right?"

"I remember the last time you took me to a random bar." She didn't seem angry. She seemed sort of like she was even taunting me.

I rolled my eyes. "I didn't take you here because I have any business to attend to, as I did last time. This is completely spontaneous. It has nothing to do with anything, okay?"

She smiled. I was winning her over. "Will they serve me?"

I smiled a crooked smile in return. "They'll serve you."

We walked in the bar, and immediately, I took a seat and ordered two beers. Elena sat beside me just as the bartender – a tubby blonde girl – brought the drinks over. Elena immediately took a swig.

"You remember the last time we were at a bar together, I saved your life?" Elena reminded me suddenly, a smug smile on her face.

I rolled my eyes and laughed. "Yes, I remember. I told you I would never forget, didn't I?"

"And I'm not the worst company to keep either, remember that?"

I nodded. "Well it's true. You're way more fun than Stefan. You like to have fun, don't you?"

She smiled, as if proud of herself. "Yes. I do like to have fun." I ordered another round of beers. "And Stefan likes to have fun too, you know! He's just a sort of . . . _careful_ person, that's all."

I snorted. "Yes, Stefan is all about having fun," I agreed sarcastically.

Elena rolled her eyes and then yelled to the bartender, "Hey can we get a round of shots?"

"Shots?"

She shrugged and smiled innocently. Her brown eyes were so beautiful. I got lost in them momentarily.

The blonde bartender brought the shots. Elena picked one up and raised it slightly, saying loudly, "A toast! To fun!"

We clinked glasses and downed the vodka.

It didn't take too long for Elena to get drunk after a couple more shots. Vampires don't get drunk though, so I took care of her. she stumbled around and couldn't find the bathroom at least three times. I didn't mind helping her and taking care of her though.

After a bit, Elena seemed to sober up a bit more. We were sitting at the bar when a man came up, and sat beside Elena. He smiled at her and greeted her, "Hey, girl. Can I buy you a drink?"

Elena turned to him and without a second thought replied, "No."

His smile faded. "You sure?"

"I'm sure." Elena turned her attention away from him.

But this man was very persistent. He interjected, "Is it because of this guy?" He jerked a thumb at me. "Because I could take this guy. I could fight him, you know."

"No, it's not him, I just don't want you to bother me," Elena said forcefully.

"Come on, buddy, I can take you." The man rose from his seat with a clatter and came toward me. I rose as well. I could feel anger bubbling in my blood. I could feel myself begin to seethe. I didn't care if I hurt this guy. I wanted to hurt him.

"Damon, don't," Elena warned.

I didn't listen. When the man charged me, I punched him right in the jaw, and he went flying backwards. Elena jumped to her feet and looked at me as if disgusted. Her lip was curled and her forehead crinkled. Then she quickly left. The chubby blonde girl who was bartending smiled smugly at me and slurred loudly, "There goes your girl!"

I glanced dangerously at her before I followed Elena out.

"Elena! Elena!" I yelled. I couldn't see her in the darkness, the dim lights pouring from the bar's windows barely lighting the parking lot. I finally found her leaning against my car, her arms crossed as she stared down at her feet. "Elena," I started.

"You didn't have to do that, Damon," she replied sharply, cutting me off.

"He was challenging me."

"You know you're better. You didn't have to show off."

I looked down, ashamed. There had been a part of me that had wanted to show off for Elena. I felt a tiny bit guilty but I still replied through gritted teeth, "I did it for you."

"I didn't ask you to."

A bit exasperated, I said swiftly without thinking, "Elena, there are so many things I'd like to say to you, but I don't know how."

I knew what I had said but I didn't really care. Then Elena rose from her leaning position against the hood of my car and turned to face me. She looked at me softly. She didn't seem angry anymore. After a pause she asked gently, "What things?"

I didn't look her in the eye. I stared at her right shoulder. We didn't speak for some time. But Elena persistently looked at me with her soulful brown eyes, and I couldn't resist their lure. I finally peered into them and I felt my mouth open and a stream of words pour from it. "You make me wish I were a better person. I wish you would accept me. But you think I'm worth saving, and that's all I can ask for because I know I've been a monster. But I trust you and I _care_ about you. And I don't believe anyone feels the way I do about you. Not even Stefan."

She looked at me sadly, her eyes shining. I looked down at her. She placed her hand on my cheek and whispered, "I've never met anyone quite like you before, Damon." Our faces inched close. Our lips were but a breath away as she whispered to me, the sound almost inaudible, "Please don't let me hit the ground."

Our lips met. It was a brief, sweet moment. I liked the way it felt. I was kissing someone I actually cared for.

She pulled back and then looked up into my eyes. "You're quite arresting, Elena," I murmured, smoothing her hair back.

Then she pulled me to her, and we kissed passionately. I hadn't been expecting that. Of course I kissed her back and yes, it was very nice, but I didn't think she would be so okay with kissing me. Not that I actually minded that too much.

She clutched the lapels of my leather jacket and pulled me even closer to her. I coiled one arm around her waist and the other grasped her cheek softly, gently, pulling her to me.

Then she stopped. She pulled away and looked beside us, but there was no one there. She let go of my jacket and backed away a step or two. I was confused but didn't say anything.

"Can we go?" she asked, not looking at me.

I nodded and got in the car. We drove to nearby Best Western and I checked us in for separate room. After I helped Elena get her suitcase to her room, she closed her door a crack and whispered, "Good night." She then closed the door, and I retired to my room.

**I based the kiss on Katherine and Damon's in the season finale, if you didn't notice x) But the season finale hasn't happened in this story, so it doesn't matter!**

**Anyway, leave a review, tell me your OPINION OF THE KISS! I would like to hear it(;**


	5. Sunshine

** Hello, readers. I'm sorry if there was any confusion for the last chapter, Many Things. The website was being weird and saying there wasn't any text found hours after I had posted. I'm sorry :/**

** Also, like the new icon? Eh, eh? I do(; And there are plenty more where that one cam from!**

** Let us begin.**

_I'm so heavy, heavy . . . Heavy in your arms . . . I'm so heavy, heavy . . . Heavy in your arms . . ._

I woke up in the morning with an awful headache. My skull throbbed, and I could hear the blood behind my ears swish around, pounding as loud as the rest of my head. From the moment I opened my eyes, I felt like my head was too heavy for my body. It took many tries to lift myself. After about ten minutes, I was finally able to sit up in the bed, only to bury my face in my palms, the ache in my head worsening.

That's when I heard a voice from across the room greet me, "Good morning, Elena."

I was startled, and my heart jolted, causing me to grab my chest. I looked into the corner of the room where the armchair was beside the window and saw Damon sitting in it, basking in the sunlight, the picture of ease. I narrowed my eyes at him.

But I soon forgot my anger at Damon for scaring me first thing in the morning when the pain in my head became worse as I tried to get out of bed. My eyes clenched in pain, I felt my head hobble on my neck, as if it were so very heavy and about to topple over any minute. I clutched my forehead. Then I felt a weak gust of wind pass over me, and when I opened my eyes, I saw Damon squatting before me. "Are you okay?" he asked, his eyebrows pulled together.

I nodded, saying meekly, "Worst hangover I've ever had."

Damon nodded too, and bit his lip. He was gone in a second, but back even sooner, a glass of water and an aspirin with him. I smiled, relieved, and took the medicine. "You're a lifesaver, Damon. What time is it?"

Damon checked the clock beside the bed. "7:52."

My eyes widened with panic. "Oh, no! Damon, we have to be on the road right now!"

I tried to stand but vertigo hit me, and I knew I was going to fall over. Luckily, Damon caught me. I buried my face in his leather shoulder and groaned. "I think it's best to wait until you feel better before we get on the road. I can't have you puking in my car."

I giggled but then groaned again. It hurt to even laugh. Damon sighed, picked me up, and placed me in the armchair. My head lulled, as if dead. I didn't want to pick it up. Damon placed his fingers under my chin and pulled my face to his. "Are you sure it's just a headache?"

I nodded. I felt my brain rock inside my head as I did so.

After waiting about half an hour for the aspirin to work, I started to remember everything that had happened that night. The bartender had hit on Damon multiple times, I fell over the pool table, and broke the handle on one of the toilets in the ladies' room. It had seemed like a fun night until I remembered a man coming to me and offering to buy me a drink. I tried to sober up and refused him, and he challenged Damon, thinking I was with him, which I was, but not in the way the man though we were. I didn't want Damon to hurt him, I knew what he was capable of, but Damon smacked him square in the face anyway. I remembered being shocked into sobriety and stormed out. Damon followed me and apologized.

Then he said something . . . something that was so sweet and genuine, I believed I was dreaming . . .

What was it?

And then I realized it. _"__And I don't believe anyone feels the way I do about you." _And then he kissed me.

Even thinking back on it, it made me smile. Damon had never been so sweet to me, but I knew he wasn't lying. I knew he would never lie about something like that, it wasn't like him. Then again, it wasn't like him to say something like that anyway.

And he had kissed me! It was something I hadn't realized I had thought about very much until it happened. And it was how I thought it would be. It wasn't overly passionate – it was perfect.

I played the memories of Damon and I from last night over and over again in my head, each time it became more and more distinct, which made me even happier to play it over again.

Then I realized that my headache had vanished. And Damon was sitting right beside me, eyeing me suspiciously.

I looked down, abashed. "What?" I murmured.

Damon shook his head. "Nothing."

Had he been thinking of those memories too?

He laughed. I looked at him, puzzled, my eyebrows knitting together. "You don't really daze off a lot."

I shrugged. "Only with you around, it seems."

Damon smiled his signature Damon Smile, and the rose. "I assume your headache is better?"

"Yes, I'm fine now. Let's go."

After I had changed, packed, and put my luggage in the trunk of Damon's car, I went back into the hotel and found Damon at the continental breakfast area, drinking a cup of coffee. He looked up at me guiltily and raised his mug, asking, "Coffee?"

I gave a half-smile. "Can we please get on the road?"

He rolled his eyes and got up. He checked us out of the hotel, and then we went to the car and drove away.

The sun was bright as it passed in between the houses and the trees of Pensacola, Florida. But soon the houses and trees disappeared, and we got on the massive interstate highway that spanned from Florida to California, I-10. It wasn't very pretty, and I even missed the mundane beauty of a hotel room. But I counted the cars that passed, and that helped ease my discomfort among the ugly highway.

Damon steered the car cavalierly, using only one hand while the other rested beside the gearshift. He was a mystery to watch. He would peer out of the window and watch the cars pass occasionally, but mostly kept his eyes on the road. He was haughty as he drove this time, contrary to the previous times I had watched as he gripped the wheel with white knuckles. He must have been happy or confident when he drove so easily, thought we were on a massive highway among dozens of other cars. He drummed his fingers on the steering wheel to an unknown beat that only he could hear. He over hand down my gearshift toyed with the handle, tracing patterns upon its head. I couldn't place it, but there was such an air of enigma enshrouding him that I was desperate to get through, and to the other side where I knew him and he was no longer just a mysterious vampire to me.

I turned my attention back to my window, and then to the limited view of the sky from it. The sun was directly above us, I knew, a great big fiery ball of energy. The sunlight beat down on the car, and I wanted to feel the warmth. "Let's roll down the windows," I suggested.

Damon turned to me his eyebrows raised at the sudden comment, but he rolled the windows down and allowed for the sunshine to pour in and the wind to whistle through. I smiled and laughed as my hair flew around, surely messing it up beyond the point of repairing, but it was still fun as I felt Florida warmth stretch across my cheek.

* * *

I couldn't stop grinning. I watched, very pleasantly amused, as Elena laughed and smiled. Her long, dark locks were blowing about in the fierce Florida breeze, causing her joy, which caused me joy just the same. Her deep brown eyes were alight, smiling the same as her small, pink lips. They drew me in. I wanted to touch them again, the same way we had last night. I wanted to kiss her.

I was pulled from my reverie when Elena twisted her fingers around my own. They tapping the gearshift absentmindedly and I hadn't really been aware of them until I felt Elena's warm fingers grasp my own.

What was she doing? I looked at her strangely, but she let go of me before she could see. She knelt on the car seat, undid her seatbelt and stuck her head and shoulders out of the window. I wanted to cry, "Elena!" but I didn't. I knew she would be fine. And she also couldn't see me acting so caring, or she would think something was wrong.

"Don't you feel that Southern sunshine?" Elena cried to me as she hung from the car window, the people in passing cars looking at her oddly. Elena didn't mind them though.

I laughed gently and said over the violent currents of air, "Yeah, it's nice. I love the deep South."

Elena pulled herself from the window and opted instead to let her long, beautiful legs, swaddled in blue denim, dangle out. I watched as she pulled off her shoes before she let her legs sit outside the car. She had painted her toenails a bright, happy shade of yellow.

"You love the South?" Elena asked nonchalantly as her feet swayed with the breeze.

I shrugged. "Yeah, I guess. I've been down here a lot. I've been to a lot of places though."

"Where?"

I smiled surreptitiously. "Places."

"Have you been around the world?"

"Yes, I have. I've watched the entire world change over the past century and a half." Elena nodded casually. I cleared my throat. "You know you should probably call Stefan."

Elena straightened in her seat and pulled her feet inside the car. She fished her phone out of her cardigan pocket, which she had discarded due to the heat, and checked her phone. She ran her fingers through her long hair. "Six missed calls. All from Stefan."

I rolled my eyes. "He can be a drama queen."

With a worried expression, she dialed Stefan who picked up on the first ring with, "Elena!"

"Hi," was her curt response. She sounded very guilty.

"Elena, I've been trying to call you."

"I know. I didn't hear my phone. Damon and I got off to a late start this morning –"

"I have some very important news. I need to speak to Damon." Elena and I exchanged glances.

She handed me the phone. "Hi there, brother!" I said with mock enthusiasm.

"Save it," Stefan replied tersely. "Katherine. She came to the boarding house yesterday."

"_What_?" I yelled. I exhaled sharply.

"She can get into our house since there isn't a human resident."

"What did she want?"

There was a long pause. "Nothing." Stefan was obviously hiding something.

"What aren't you telling me, Stefan?" I asked dangerously.

"Damon, I didn't go with her, she –"

"What are you _hiding_?"

"Katherine said she was coming back for me." I stopped. But I had to pull myself back and keep driving. "Damon, I . . . She didn't even mention you."

Elena looked at me, concern clouding her dark eyes. "Damon, what is it?" she asked. Her voice was comforting.

"Well what did you say?" I asked Stefan. My voice was blank, stoic, completely void of any emotion. It caused Elena forehead to crinkle and ask me what had happened again.

"I told her I didn't want to go with her and that she could leave. She got very angry and tried to attack me, but I stopped her. I repeated that I didn't want her and then she left before I could say anything else."

"Okay. Hopefully she's gone from Mystic Falls forever." But I didn't even care. How could she not even _mention_ me? Had I ever once crossed her mind in the past century we had been apart?

I felt Elena's arms coil around one of my arms.

I glanced at a green sign that said something about an exit. I got into the right lane and zipped down the exit at an illegal speed and then we were among fast food chains and gas stations. I stopped at a convenience store and parked, the car jerking forward and rocking with the abrupt stop after racing toward the parking lot like a racecar driver.

I got out the car and slammed the door so hard, it began to rock with Elena in it. She got out of the car as well and was right beside me in an instant.

"I don't know if Katherine is gone forever. She may come back or do something evil like terrorize the town."

I nodded. How could she not mention me?

"Well Elena wants to talk to you," I said, changing the subject.

Stefan seemed puzzled when he agreed. I handed the phone over to Elena, and they began talking but I didn't hear.

It had always been so real with Katherine and I. I was sure she had never compelled me. How could she not think of me, not ask for me, not look for me as I had? Had she even really cared when we were together back in those days? It felt like everything I had known was wrong.

I was slumped against the back wall of the store when Elena found me. She handed me a beer and I took it without looking at her. I felt so emotionless, so blank. Like nothing mattered.

How could she not even ask for me?

I consumed the beer is two large gulps. Elena fiddled with the neck of her beer, not having taken a sip yet. She sat beside me, and looked at me with her perfect eyes as they glinted in the mid-afternoon sunlight. I didn't dare turn to face her though.

Suddenly Elena said in a low voice, "Stefan told me about what happened. How Katherine didn't want you."

"How could she not mention me?" I asked no one in particular, still staring but not seeing.

"Katherine shouldn't matter anymore, Damon. She was cruel, spiteful and she still is. She was a self-centered, hateful bitch. Not even you deserve someone so evil like that."

There was a long, seemingly endless space of time between what her wise words and what happened next.

Elena kissed my cheek tenderly, her feathery lips just barely meeting my skin. Then got up and left.

I still felt the imprint of Elena's lips on my cheek long after she had left me here to sulk.

I suddenly became animated again as I lifted my hand to touch the place she had kissed me. It was like there was an unseen mark there now, burning a hole right through my skin. But it was a nice type of burning – it was like a slow singeing that sent embers into the sky as it pierced through my skin and set fire to my unmoving heart.

I then stood up without thinking, my hand still covering the secret mark of Elena. But then I realized this and removed my hand. I looked at it, seeing nothing but feeling the same sensation of a beautiful painful blazing that I felt deep in my heart.

Elena's voice came into earshot as I got closer to the parking lot. She was talking to her aunt as she sat in the car, waiting for me.

I slipped into the car undetected by Elena. She surprised when she heard the door slam and saw me sitting at the steering wheel. Elena hastily hung up and looked at me until I spoke. When I did, it wasn't what she was expecting to hear, "I'm sorry we didn't go very far today. We'll drive through the night if that's okay with you."

Elena pursed her lips. "That's fine."

She was expecting me to talk about Katherine or give a big speech about love. But I wouldn't. That was something Stefan would do. But I wasn't Stefan. I was the _other_ brother. I was the mean one that people hated. I was the least favorite of the Salvatores.

I was the second choice.

**Awh, Damon3**

**Tell me what you think. What are your opinions on Damon? Mine is that he is so misunderstood and just needs to be the first choice for once(: He really deserves it because he's always only the second best, throughout his entire life, it seems.**

**LEAVE A REVIEW?**


	6. Cradled

**Hello again, readers.**

** Forgive the self-pitying Damon in the beginning of the story. It gets A LOT better, trust me. (;**

** Don't forget a review!**

_And is it worth the wait . . . All this killing time . . . Are you strong enough to stand . . . Protecting both your heart and mine . . ._

Elena eventually drifted off to sleep, the other cars' headlights gently lulling her into slumber. And then I was completely alone with my thoughts, without someone to distract me.

I felt so _hated_. And it had never been a problem up until I had moved back to Mystic Falls with my master plan, which ultimately didn't work. But before I returned to my hometown, I never had any problem with being hated. I even enjoyed it. I enjoyed crushing sorority girls' hopes and dreams of being with me forever. I enjoyed tormenting my brother to the point where I could never be forgiven. Those things gave me a sadistic pleasure. But now, after knowing Elena and _not_ wanting to be hated for the first time in a century, it was depressing being hated so much.

Katherine hated me. Stefan hated me. Everyone in Mystic Falls except for the desperate widows hated me. And Elena . . . I wasn't sure if she hated me or not. I could never tell.

It seemed like I had pushed away everyone I had ever cared about at all. My brother and I had gotten along fine until he made me hate him and I vowed to torture him the rest of our lives. And Katherine . . . somehow, I had pushed her away or she had pushed me away. Either way, I was unwanted by her, the one woman who I loved more than anyone. The one I would have gone to the ends of the earth for. She was my first and only love, and she didn't want me anymore. She wanted Stefan.

Stefan had given me reason to hate him, and I had given him reason to hate me. But the fact that Katherine came back for _him_ boiled me blood and clenched my teeth.

In a lapse of kismet, I glanced at Elena's sleeping body. Her head was against the tinted window, her legs curled up toward her, an altered fetal position. She looked so angelic as the headlights moved across her like shadows periodically, casting a glow over her.

I didn't want to be hated. Seeing Elena made me realize that. While I would never change who I was, I didn't want to be hated by everyone. I didn't want _Elena_ to hate me. I wanted her to like me like she did Stefan – she wanted to be around me, wanted to be _with_ me.

I snapped out of that absurd train of thought. How could I want any of that from Elena? Though she and Katherine were completely different people, it was just too odd how they were nearly identical. I couldn't be around Katherine, no, not yet. Not ever.

But . . . if I were with Elena . . .

It was absurd.

But I couldn't stop my mind from imagining it.

I would win her heart and tell her she already had mine. I'd cradle her, she'd cradle me. We'd lay around and do the things that lovers do, like pull the stars from the sky that wasn't actually there and place them in our eyes. We'd drink ourselves until the morning, creating heart-shaped bruises, and then share toothpaste kisses at the crack of dawn. Then we'd give divine kissing throughout the day, and she would make shapes just for my eyes on paper and hang them on the wall. I would be hers and she would be mine. She'd be the one to save me. It would be like a goddamn fairytale.

I couldn't believe I was thinking that way.

Elena stirred beside me. Suddenly, she jerked away, gasping for air as if she had been holding her breath. I clutched her heart and spluttered, "Stop the car, please, Damon."

I turned down and exit and stopped at a gas station. The lights from the lights that flashed _Exxon_ illuminated the place.

Elena ran her fingers through her hair and felt her forehead and felt the thin layer of sweat glazing it. She panted and gasped heavily, a look of distress upon her fine features.

Obviously, she'd had a bad dream. What would Stefan do? I tried to think of his brooding forehead, his calm smiles, his golden thoughts, but I drew a blank.

"Was it a bad dream?" I asked, sounding as clueless as I could.

Elena nodded. "I . . . It was Stefan. He was trying to _kill_ me." She turned to me. I could see her grief in the way her forehead wrinkled and her dark eyes grew dimmer. "You weren't influencing my dreams, were you? I know you can do that."

I shook my head, my worry for Elena building. I knew she didn't mean to be, but she was vexatious that she made me anxious about her so easily. "I-I had over things on my mind."

She nodded. "I believe you."

"You'll be okay?"

She titled her neck so her forehead rested upon the cold tinted glass of the car window. A delicious fragrance, a combination of roses and vanilla, wafted past me. A hunger then flared within me when I saw her bare, exposed neck and the blood vessels that pumped in it, churning up a noise so delectable that I couldn't resist it. I wanted to pull her to me and then sink my teeth into her beautifully polished flesh . . .

Her eyes flashed at me and then she straightened suddenly, backing against the car door. "Damon!" she cried softly.

I quickly turned away and rubbed my eyes. "I'm sorry. I'm just a little hungry. I'm sorry, Elena. You know I wouldn't hurt you."

She nodded, but didn't move. "You should go hunt. Where are we, by the way?"

I still did not face her and I couldn't control my face. "About halfway through Texas."

"Well just go hunting, it's fine, I can wait."

I nodded. It was best. "Stay here. I'll be back soon. If I can't find anyone, I guess I'll just try the Stefan diet. Find a squirrel or two."

I stepped out of the car and without a hesitation, ran away as fast as I could.

* * *

That hadn't meant anything. Damon wouldn't eat me . . . he had had plenty of chances to do so, but he never did. And he had been around for too long to give into sudden, impulsive cravings.

I trusted Damon. I trusted him not to hurt me.

I then realized how stupid that sounded.

Damon killed people. He hurt the people around him – Stefan, Caroline. But we had some sort of connection, an understanding. And as stupid as it seemed, I felt as though he would not hurt me.

Damon had left his keys in the car. I hopped into the driver's seat, and turned the car on. I tooled around this town that we had stopped in, which was mostly gas stations and fast food restaurants. Finally, I found a comfortable looking Hilton Hotel. I parked the car and texted Damon, alerting me as to where I was and where I'd be: the hotel bar. I entered the hotel and booked two rooms. I didn't even bother to go back to the car for Damon and I's suitcases. I just headed straight for the bar.

I decided to wait for Damon to find me. The bartender was eyeing suspiciously – I doubted he would have served me.

While I waited, I _tried_ to people watch. But my mind kept wandering back to Damon.

Always back to him.

Soon enough though, Damon came, catching me off guard with, "Why aren't you at the bar?"

I nearly had a heart attack. But by now, I was used to Damon's stealth and quickness. "I don't think he'll serve me. Do you think you can, you know, compel him? So he'll serve me?"

Damon nodded and motioned for me to follow him, so I did. We went right to the bar. The bartender – a thin man who was balding slightly – smiled smugly and said, his thoughts of superiority resonating in his tone, "Can I see your IDs please?" Damon put his elbows on the bar and leaned in, staring at the man directly in the eye. I watched his pupil dilate and then return to normal. The bartender then smiled and asked us, forgetting about the IDs completely, "What will it be?"

Damon smiled his confident half-smile and said, "Two beers, please."

"Sure! It's on the house!"

Damon cocked his head, looking as self-assured as ever, and said evenly with a hint of mocking, "Thank you."

We were given the beers, and Damon drank up. I did too. After a few more rounds, I was starting to feel the alcohol in my system. But I was having fun talking to Damon and kept on drinking.

"Did you find anyone tasty enough to eat tonight?" I asked. I was slightly tipsy at this time.

Damon seemed unaffected by the alcohol. But I knew that it took a lot of alcohol to get a vampire drunk. He shrugged. "Everyone tastes about the same." He grinned, showing off his sinister side. "That doesn't mean you humans don't taste absolutely delicious."

"Everyone tastes the same? I always thought some people tasted better than others."

"No, not really. Don't get me wrong, Elena. I'm sure your just _scrumptious_."

I burst into a fit of hysterical laughter. If I hadn't been tipsy and there had been other people in the bar besides us, I would have been embarrassed. But it was only Damon and I, and I felt . . . comfortable around him. Damon smiled too, watching me with some sort of spark in his eyes. He caught me staring at that spark, and his smile vanished.

"You know, some people's blood _smell_ better than others. But smell isn't very easily detected. It takes many years to build up that sort of sense, whereas hearing improves when you start transitioning."

I giggled fiercely. "What does _my_ blood smell like?"

"To vampires, blood can take on a myriad of fragrances – anything from sweet and fresh like flowers to acrid and bitter like smoke or metal, though the taste doesn't really differ. You smell like some sort of mixture of roses and pure vanilla. It's nice, a very calming scent."

"Does smelling make you hungrier?"

"Yes. But it depends on the circumstances. If I'm starving, yes, but if I just happen to catch a whiff, not nearly. But the _sight_ of blood – well that is enough to drive a vampire crazy with hunger."

I nodded and finished my sixth beer, feeling a bit dizzy, but feeling good mostly. "Being a vampire must be very sensory."

"It is. Your eyesight is more defined. Your hearing is excellent. Oh, and vampire sex is wild. Much better than anything experienced as a human. But other than that, touch isn't really effected, much like smell. It improves with age though."

My head began to pulse to the tune of the smooth jazz in the bar and I groaned. Damon took a swig of his beer and then raised an eyebrow at me. I looked at him and replied curtly, "I can feel myself getting a headache. I think I'm going to go to my room now."

"We're having fun though," Damon pleaded with a arrogant smirk.

I got up, but immediately felt my legs give out under me. Damon caught me in an instant. I groaned again and let my head fall back as my mouth twisted with annoyance. "Damon," I moaned. I buried my face in his jacket and he laughed.

"You want me to carry you?"

I didn't say anything. I knew Damon rolled his eyes as he picked me up, holding me bridal style. He took me through the lobby and to the elevator where he asked me what the room number was. "296, on the second floor," I muttered against him.

The elevator was fast, and he stepped onto the second floor in a minute. We traveled down the deserted hallway until Damon stopped and announced, "Alright, Room 296."

I lifted my head and he let me down. I was weak and I fumbled with the room key. When I had finally gotten it open, I motioned for Damon to come in as I did. He followed me in, and closed the door behind him. I went to the bed blindly, barely looking around at the room. I flopped on, and curled into a ball, my eyes drifting closed.

I felt Damon pull of my shoes gently and then lift me so he could put me under the sheets. He then turned to leave, but I had an urge to grab his arm, wordlessly asking him to stay. When I did, Damon did not resist. It was like he wanted to stay as much as I wanted him to.

I moved over and Damon laid beside me, sighing in the way he did, though I knew he would not resist. He wrapped an arm around my shoulder as I nestled into the space between his arm and cool body. He cradled me, and I dismissed the fact that this was different from Damon's usual attitude. Maybe I was dreaming. I didn't care. And then I drifted off to sleep, into his endearing arms.

**They are just so cute!**

**And I know the ending seems SO, VERY unlike Damon, but I'm trying to bring out his compassionate, loving side. The side we saw in the flashback from his human years. I'm trying to bring out the humanity in Damon, if you can't see(:**

**PLEASEEEE leave a review, lovelies!**


	7. The Longed For

** Hi. Sorry, it's been a while, hasn't it? Believe it or not, I started school this passed week. I know. Sucks ASS**

** Anyway, here is le chapter.**

_Who is the betrayer? . . . Who's the killer in the crowd? . . . The one who creeps in corridors . . . And doesn't make a sound . . ._

The sun streamed through the hotel room's large window, waking me as it burned through my eyelids. My eyes cracked open. I could feel the crustiness of sleep trying to glue my eyelids back together. But I rubbed them and woke up more, not so tempted to go back to sleep.

I ran my fingers through my straight hair and realized I was absolutely filthy, my hair hoarding enough grease to shellac ten teenaged boys' hair. I grimaced. I was never usually this dirty, I didn't allow myself to get so very unclean. Had I really not been paying attention to anything at all these past days with Damon?

I shivered, and realized I was _freezing_, though I was under three blankets and still in the sweater I fell asleep in. I was in the very center of the bed. I looked beside me and saw a slight imprint of someone who had been in that position on the mattress for a long time. I brushed my fingers along it but pulled them away and realized that indentation in the mattress was absolutely wintry, which was probably why I was feeling so cold myself. I put my fingers to it again, and kept them there. Though my body was shivering from the lack of heat, somehow the coldness of the mattress was comforting in a way.

I stretched and yawned and then got out of the bed, being sure to leave the groove in the mattress undisturbed.

I stumbled around the room, observing my surroundings. I went to the window, and peered down at the parking lot below and the interstate that was just beyond it, the cars upon it speeding along. I let my fingers glide upon the filthy glass, watching a red truck pull out of the parking spot beside Damon's old Camaro. I watched it rattle and bump out of the parking lot and then merge onto the freeway, as Damon and I would.

Damon.

Where was Damon? I wandered back to the bed where I glanced upon the imprint in the mattress and remember the coolness of it and then memories from the previous night floated back to me. I had asked him wordlessly to stay with me, in bed. We hadn't done anything. We only embraced as I drifted into a deep slumber, his arms holding me tightly, protectively, even as I dreamed. Yes, I remembered everything.

Then I heard a muffled squeak and it was then that I realized the shower in the bathroom had been running when I awoke, and now it was shut off. My eyebrows pulled together and I froze in my tracks. After a few moments, the door swung open, revealing Damon, only a towel wrapped around his hips, the steam pouring from the room after him.

I raised an eyebrow at him, and he smiled arrogantly. He stared at me intently before explaining, "Elena, I hadn't showered in a couple days and you were still asleep. I didn't think you'd wake before I got out. I'm sorry. Is that what you wanted to hear?"

I rolled my eyes. "It's fine, Damon," I assured. "I'm going to shower though. I'm as unclean as you, I deserve a shower too."

Damon cocked his head. "If I'd known you wanted to shower to, I would have woken you so you could join me."

I threw in a dirty look and closed the bathroom door behind me.

The room was filled with steam though the fan was on. I started the shower and stripped down, leaving my clothes with Damon's – just haphazardly lying on the floor beside the toilet. I then stepped into the burning water that streamed from the showerhead, and scrubbed myself clean. I even washed my hair twice with complimentary hotel shampoo and conditioner and used the bar of hotel soap to clean every inch of my body, and then shaved with a crappy, complimentary razor.

After I felt as clean as I possibly could, I turned the water off and grabbed two towel. I wrapped one around my head, capturing all of my hair, like a turban. The other wrapped around my body, but barely so. It was short and small. Damon would have a field day when I walked out.

But Damon wasn't there when I walked into the hotel room. I even called his name, but he didn't answer, and it wasn't as if he could hide in the room, it was too small. But when I was sure he wasn't in the room, I shrugged and shimmied the towel off. I then rifled through my suitcase and found a tank top, a pair of jeans, and a sweater to wear. I dressed quickly, but opted to just carry the sweater, keeping it in case I needed it. But it was very hot in Texas, and I doubted I would.

When I had finished dressing and getting ready, Damon came in suddenly. I was a little surprised to see him. "I was just coming to get you. Where were you?" I said as he entered.

He grinned. "They maid staff here is . . . impressive."

My jaw dropped. "Damon! Don't tell me you killed someone here, in this hotel!"

"Alright, don't get too upset. I compelled the maid to come out back with me and had a little snack. She'll be fine."

I sighed. "Well I can't get angry at you, I guess."

He shrugged and changed the subject. "Are you all ready to go?"

"Yes. Do you mind bringing the luggage down?"

He nodded and grabbed the suitcase. I walked down the hallway with him. When we got the elevator, I punched the button and it began to move. Damon then suggested, "Hey, do you want to stop at the Wal-Mart before we get back on I-10? I saw one near here and I thought maybe we could pick something up for the human. Sound good?"

I smiled. That was, Damon was being . . . nice. "Yeah. That would be really great, actually," I answered.

We checked out of the hotel and then hopped into the car. We drove a short way before approaching the massive convenience store. There was barely anyone around, so we parked near the store in the shade of a birch tree. Damon cut the engine and we got out.

We entered the giant Wal-Mart and found it as deserted as parking lot had been. We exchanged glances, and then continued on.

"Okay, what do you want to pick up, Elena?" Damon asked, his voice echoing around the empty store.

My mouth twisted as I thought and then I exclaimed, "Food! Good food. Pop-Tarts, cereal, Coca-Cola."

Damon nodded. "Very healthy choices."

I smiled dreamily. But I hadn't meant to. I had just meant to smile, because he was being funny. It wasn't as though I was lost in deep blue eyes. It wasn't like that.

But then our eyes _did_ meet, and I felt the air pass from my lungs, and I couldn't even breathe. As my eyes fixed on Damon's, I felt as though I was diving into the ocean, falling into the sky. They were enchanting. The indigo irises were hypnotizing, and I couldn't draw myself away until Damon's forehead crinkled and he waved his hand in front of my face. He said something, and I was pulled from my fixation. I clutched my vervain filled necklace, assuring myself I hadn't been compelled. I then looked up at him again, being sure to stray from his mesmerizing eyes and croaked, "I'm fine. Let's go shop now." And then walked ahead.

The grocery section of Wal-Mart was toward the back. We picked out everything we needed, laughing as we sorted through the junk food, marveling at the names, the contents, and the unhealthiness of it all. We decided on an array of cookies, Pop-Tarts, and cheese-flavored snacks as well as three six-packs of Coca-Cola. Damon carried everything back to the front of the store with ease.

As we walked, chatting on amiably, I spotted something from the corner of my eye and cried, "Look! The book section!"

Damon turned and saw the section as well. He groaned, "Elena, everyone knows the book sections in Wal-Mart is crap."

I faced him disapprovingly and replied, "Well maybe, but look what they have! _Mythology_, by Edith Hamilton."

"You like mythology?" He seemed almost completely baffled by this simple interest of mine.

"Of course, I love the stories – how could you not?" I grabbed a copy and flipped through it until I came upon a page with a quote by Aristophanes. I quoted it to Damon, smiling proudly, "'. . . Black-winged Night; Into the bosom of Erebus dark and deep; Laid a wind-born egg, and as the season rolled; Forth sprang Love, the longed-for, shining, with wings of gold.'"

Damon's eyebrows knit together, puzzled by the beautiful quotation. I raised my eyebrows and snapped the book shut. I laid it back on the shelf. When I turned to see Damon again, he still seemed very perplexed. I gasped. "Damon! the quote is talking about the birth of love into the universe. It was beautiful, wasn't it?"

"Love?"

"Yes. From nothing, from the black-winged Night came Love. And from that, Chaos of the universe was tamed and the gods were born. That's how the world began in mythology."

"So, from Chaos . . . came Love? Love was born of darkness?"

This idea seemed so far-fetched and bewildering to Damon. It made me smile sweetly, his innocence and confusion bleeding through his naturally arrogant façade. It was pleasant, refreshing. I was seeing Damon in a new way as I saw the understanding sail across his face, washing away the confusion, replacing it with a basic understanding of Love. I couldn't help myself from grinning ear to ear.

Damon smiled softly in return. "That was a nice quote."

"Yes, I like it."

"I do too."

Gazing at each other dreamily, we continued to the cashier. There was only one station open. As Damon paid, he stole glances at me, and the rude cashier could only stare in disgust. Damon nor I seemed to care at all what she thought about us though.

As soon as we got into the car, I grabbed a Coke and snapped it open. Damon did the same and then he started the engine. We rode out of the small town we'd stayed in and onto I-10, sipping our Cokes as Damon tried to tune the radio. We were so out of the way though, we couldn't pick up anything without static. So Damon shut the radio off and gripped the steering wheel, sighing. I looked down at my hands and peeked at him from beneath my eyelashes. My thoughts begged him to turn to me, to look at me too, but he never did. And the car ride continued that way. Though I lulled between repose and wakefulness often, I always found myself looking at Damon through my lashes, and he looking at the road, alert and cautious as he drove us across Texas and New Mexico. It didn't seem like we had gone very far. We had finally gotten on the road at about ten. But one moment, I blinked for a fraction of a second, and when I opened my eyes, it was dark outside. I was shocked as I jolted into a sitting position versus a slumped position. Damon turned to me briefly and said, "Good evening."

"Oh my god . . . what time is it?" I asked groggily.

Damon glanced at the dashboard. "11:03PM."

I yawned. "I closed my eyes for a second, and then all of a sudden, it was dark outside. It's 11 o'clock?" Damon nodded. I glanced out of the window, but couldn't see anything. "Where are we?"

Damon looked a bit guilty. "Well we were on I-10 as we have been, but when we passing through Phoenix, I saw I-17 and that reminded me of this great little town that was just two hours north of Phoenix. And I decided I wanted to pay a little visit and show it to you. So, right now, we are in Cottonwood, which is very close. We'll be there shortly. If it weren't so dark outside, you'd be able to see the rocks."

"Rocks? And what town is this?"

"It's called Sedona. Sedona, Arizona. It's sort of touristy, but it's very beautiful. The rocks, the Red Rocks of the desert. Sedona has a great view of them and the desert. There's also great hiking. I was thinking we could spend the day there tomorrow."

It sounded like a fun trip. Maybe a few days ago, I would have been skeptical of a trip with Damon when we were supposed to be getting to the border as quick as we could. But now, it seemed like something fun to do. _Especially_ with Damon. But there was one thing I was still questioning. "There isn't some sort of motive behind this? You don't want to visit someone at a bar and I'll have to save you there again, do you?" I tried to seem joking rather than disbelieving.

Damon rolled his eyes. "Elena, not everything I do has some sort of ulterior motive. What if I just want to show you somewhere that's really cool? You might be able to trust me this one time."

I shrugged. From the corner of my eye, I saw one of Damon's hands rest beside the gearshift, facing upward. It seemed unnatural for it to be positioned in this way, and then I realized what he must have been hoping for. And without thinking, I fulfilled that wish.

Damon and I's fingers locked. At first, Damon seemed hesitant, as if he couldn't believe what I had done. And in a way, I hadn't either. I wasn't even thinking of Stefan. My mind hadn't wandered to him in a long time, when I came to think of it. But for some reason, it didn't seem wrong to hold Damon's hand at all when Stefan wasn't around to know. Damon's fingers tightened around mine as mine did and they intertwined together so perfectly that I could only liken it to two puzzle pieces – they were the only two in the batch that fit as ideally as our fingers did.

Our fingers continued to be laced together just right as Damon pulled onto Jordan Road, entering Sedona. We continued through the town, and though I could barely see through the darkness of night, I saw the silhouettes of the red rocks like mountains in the distance. I couldn't wait to see the full splendor of Arizona grandeur the next day.

Damon leaned forward and then muttered to himself as he pulled in front of a little building. The artificial light from the windows of the edifice shone through, illuminating the tiny parking spaces out front. It was bed and breakfast. For some reason, I was slightly relieved to see something more homey this time, unlike a stark and impersonal as a hotel room. Sedona seemed very homey, very welcoming.

Damon and I's fingers parted, but met again when we walked into the bed and breakfast. Our arms dangled beside each other, our fingers brushing together once or twice before Damon tangled our fingers together once again. I couldn't help but smile when I realized he wanted to be linked to me as much as I wanted to be to him.

We walked into the building, dazed smiles upon our faces. Well, I was more dazed than Damon. Damon was cool and superior as ever as he checked us in. the lady who was at the counter was old, but lively. She grinned at us knowingly, being pleasant as ever as she handed us two room keys. She seemed slightly disappointed when Damon asked for two, but hid it in a instant. I didn't think that Damon noticed, but I did.

Damon and I walked to our separate rooms, chatting affably, Damon explaining a hike we would take the next day if it wasn't too hot. And then we arrived at our rooms and a silence and stillness blanketed the air. It was smothering, but I tried not to notice.

I looked into Damon's eyes keenly, swimming in the shimmering river of his eyes. I watched him lean in gently, slowly. It seemed a lifetime before our lips met and when they finally did, it felt as natural as I had remembered it, though this time it was less foggy because I wasn't at all intoxicated. But it felt so real and so right that every cell and every nerve ending in my body was on fire in the best way possible. Kissing Damon was as easy as could be.

But then as quickly as it started, it was over. The kiss was so brief, so sweet and satisfying that I longed for more, but was glad I couldn't have it. It was just _better_ that way. Damon looked down into my eyes, sparkling gently. He whispered, "Good night."

"Good night," I answered just as quietly.

Damon backed away slowly and then opened his door and went into his room swiftly, watching me carefully the entire time. All I could do was stare back helplessly until he was gone when I went to my room. I changed and then fell asleep promptly, my repose filled with sweet dreams of my time with Damon.

**Elena is finally starting to accept her feelings for Damon! Yay! And the next chapter is going to be filled to the brim with romance and cuteness between these two – be sure to be ready for it! I already have a lot of it planned out(:**

**REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW! Come on guys, there are a lot of you reading, but not enough reviewing. You know how to type, you got a brain, get to reviewing, my readers!**


	8. The Desert

** Hello, dearies. Here is your next chapter. This one is very important! I hope you enjoy it(; I was also suppose to be studying Spanish while writing this, so you better enjoy it! Because if you don't, my failure will be for nothing ):**

** ENJOY + REVIEW!**

_My love has concrete feet . . . My love's an iron ball . . . Wrapped around your ankles . . . Over the waterfall . . ._

I woke up very early the next morning – around 9 o'clock. I felt very wakeful and refreshed, though I'd only gotten nine ours of sleep. I slipped out of bed and inhaled the aroma of roses and stale bed and breakfast air. The room was very adorable, though small. The bathroom was even smaller, but I showered and got ready, primping and preening a little more than usual. At first, I couldn't understand my sudden, intense need to look better than I usually did, but then, my thoughts floated to Damon as I applied my mascara. When I was done fantasizing about the upcoming day we'd spend together, I realized I was trying to look especially good for Damon. I was a tiny did ashamed, but I stuffed that emotion down, letting the feelings of butterflies in my stomach overwhelm me instead.

I scoured through my suitcase, trying to find something I could wear in the Arizona heat other than jeans. I happened upon a pair of jean shorts that I rarely ever wore, but now seemed as good a time as ever to wear them. I slipped them on as well as a red V-neck shirt with short sleeves and Stefan's necklace. As I gazed at myself in the mirror, I watched my fingers fumble with the necklace's pendant. And then my mind ambled around memories of Stefan, but they were foggy, and they didn't conjure up the feeling of butterflies as they once had.

I grabbed my phone, a pair of sunglasses, and the room key, stuffing them into my pockets. Then I left the room and walked down the small lobby. The lady that had passed me knowing glances last night was still there. I scanned the room for Damon, but could perceive that he wasn't there at one glance. The woman knew who I was looking for. She smiled pleasantly and said in a shaky voice, "The young man you were with is outside, in the yard area out back."

I smiled thankfully and replied, "Thank you so much."

I wandered around the bed and breakfast, observing the rooms and the windows and the artwork that hung on the walls. The place was very cute and I liked it a lot. Damon was good at picking places to stay, I decided. And he was probably very right about the town, Sedona – as I raked my eyes over the view from the windows, I could see the beautiful rocks. They were large and majestic like mountains, but somehow so much more stunning than any mountain I saw when Damon and I passed through North Carolina. As the sun beat down on the rocks, it looked like a picture from a postcard, it was unbelievable. The colors were so vibrant, so perfect – I could have looked out on that scenery forever. But then Damon's face popped into my head, and I realized I had to find him.

I walked toward the back of the building, and opened a large door, and found myself in a lovely courtyard. There were small gardens blooming all around, flowers smiling up at the sun. A turquoise fountain tinkled beside the door, and I realized I'd stepped into a place I had never even thought could be so sweet, so striking. It was truly a garden from a fairytale – there were poppies, pansies, ginger, roses, sunflowers, and an array of Arizona wildflowers. There colors burst out into the sun, beaming in the light, rays of color shining back into my eyes. The greenery was very lovely. And the fragrance was absolutely amazing as it filled my nose. I let my eyes flutter close and just revel in the perfect aroma of such a perfect garden. My I reopened my eyes, I saw Damon, reclined in a turquoise-colored patio chair, and his feet propped up on the matching, turquoise-colored patio table. It was a perfect scene, seeing him there innocently, amongst the beautiful flowers of Arizona. It was all so _right_. It couldn't be better.

I tried to sneak up on Damon, coming behind him as he was lounging on the patio furniture but he was too quick for me. As I was about to pounce, he sped out of chair, and tackled me instead, capturing me in a unbreakable clasp, his iron arms tight around my shoulders. Yet, he was gentle with me, acknowledging that I was a delicate human. While his grip on me was firm and strong, there was sensitivity and gentleness as he held me.

I laughed as he caught me and I knew he was smiling too. He kissed the top of my head and released me. It was as if we had been together for so long. We were natural to each other. Damon being with me, me being with Damon, it wasn't scary, or secretive, or wrong: it was the exact way it was always suppose to be.

Damon's hold on me had loosened, and his arms fell to his sides. He walked around me, observing me coldly, though I could see a hint of playfulness in his deep eyes. But our fun was perturbed as the phone in my pocket rang noisily, alerting me to the outside world, the world Damon and I had removed ourselves from.

I fished my phone from my pocket and answered it immediately. I was surprised to hear Stefan's voice, and excused myself from Damon, who frowned. I went back into the building and said to Stefan, "Hi, what's going on? Is everything okay?"

"Yes. Katherine doesn't know about you or Damon. But she has been keeping an eye on me. She's been watching me." Hearing Stefan's voice was strange, so odd, as if I hadn't heard him speak in years rather than mere days. I tried to ignore my feelings of foreignness toward my supposed boyfriend though.

"She hasn't spoken to you?"

"No. But she is keeping close tabs on me, as I've said. How are you and Damon? You must be in California by now."

I felt slightly disappointed in myself. A wave of guiltiness was hitting me. I wanted to spend the day with Damon though, and that somehow seemed to override everything I felt because of Stefan. "No, we're in Arizona. But we'll get through California as soon as we can. Damon and I have it all mapped out, don't worry about us."

"Us? Elena, I'm only worried about you."

"Well don't." I hadn't meant to sound so cold, so indifferent, and as soon as the words spilled out, I wanted to take them back. But it was too late for that. More guilt washed over me.

"What has been taking you and Damon so long to go anywhere? You should have been through California by now, or at least close to Oregon. What have you two been doing?" Stefan sounded very dangerous. Like a highly jealous boyfriend.

"We haven't been doing anything. Damon is still an ass to me. He's still a monster. You're the brother I love, Stefan." While it seemed so far from the truth at this point, I made it convincing.

Stefan bought the lie. "I love you too. I'm sorry I'm so jealous. Be safe, get to the border. I'll talk to you later."

"Goodbye."

I hung up and returned my phone to me shorts' pocket. I opened the door, eager to get back to Damon in the courtyard, but didn't find him. He must have sneaked past me, gone to the car, I figured. I left the bed and breakfast out of the front entrance, and saw Damon, leaning against his car, staring ahead blankly. It was slightly reminiscent of the time I found Damon behind the convenience store after the news of Katherine and her disregard of him. My forehead wrinkled in confusion as I approached him. Damon still did not look to me when he heard me coming, and he did not look when I came beside him. I placed a hand on his shoulder and whispered, "Do you want to go? We can go on that hike you talked about."

He finally looked down at me, his eyes boring a hole through me. I had not been expecting this. Something was bothering Damon, something was eating at him, causing him to act so indifferent uninterested. It caused me to frown, but Damon appeared not to notice my confusion and discontentment. He replied coolly, "Sure. Let's go."

With that, he got into the driver's seat and turned the car on before I could even get my door open. I finally stepped into the car, and Damon then started speeding toward the Red Rocks.

* * *

I didn't want to act so apathetic towards Elena. That was not my intention for this trip together. But what she had said to Stefan on the phone, knowing I was in earshot, being a vampire, and the way she had said it made me feel so terrible. I hadn't thought it possible, but it was: Elena had made me feel _bad_ about _myself_! I thought I had been nice so far . . . where had I gone wrong with this?

I tried to push these feelings of confusion and indifference away. I could prove that I cared for her, I could prove it today. We would hike and look at the amazing view of the rocks. We would be together, all day. And Elena would see under my icy, distant, and in control exterior, that I could be good. I could be good for her, just her.

We drove to the famous Slide Rock State Park, which was practically _in _the rocks. Cacti grew from the green, desert brush. The rocks were shades of red and orange, and everything in between. The many trees and bushes of the desert were dull hues of green. The immense sky above us was beautiful and open, only a few clouds drifted lazily over us, providing a rare moment of shade from the relentless sun. Though it was not as boiling outside as I had remembered it long ago, it was still a baking temperature, and I was happy to shed my leather jacket, leaving only my dark jeans and T-shirt. But I was a vampire and natural cold, so it wasn't too bad being dressed in all black during a spring day in Arizona.

Elena was captivated, enthralled by the scenery. She stumbled along, not even watching where she was going as she stared up at the craggy layers of red and orange rock that surrounded us and the trail. I walked ahead of her, leading the way, occasionally checking back on her, and always finding Elena looking up, transfixed by the rough layers and the lightly-colored foliage that grew from the serrations.

After Elena and I had been walking for a little while, neither speaking because we were both rapt by the beautiful desert landscape, we came upon Oak Creek Canyon. The water, surrounded by the beautiful red rocks and cacti, was an amazing setting. The sun beat down on us, directly overhead, indicating that it was about noon. Elena walked ahead of me, taking in the amazing view, smiling beautifully, as if she couldn't believe any of the landscape she was seeing.

She turned to me, and looked amazed. Elena asked me, her tone completely astonished, "You've been here before? Why didn't you want to stay in the beautiful place?"

I shrugged and replied, maybe being a tiny bit too candid with her, "It was too small for me, too touristy. I know it's beautiful here, but it just wasn't a very good fit for me. But that doesn't mean I don't like to stop by every now and then and visit."

"You don't see scenery like this just _anywhere_. This is really incredible. Thanks for taking me." Elena smiled sincerely, honestly grateful that I had taken her here.

"It was my pleasure. It's nice to show people I care about other things I care about." It was a lame attempt to show her I cared, but it was worth a shot, I figured.

She turned to me. For a second, she seemed the tiniest bit shocked. But then her face softened, and she seemed ingenuous and innocent as she smiled sweetly. A scarlet color even ambushed her tan cheeks. I had never seen Elena blush before, not even for Stefan. Obviously my straightforward, blatantly obvious and desperate attempts to assure her of my trust and care were working very well, as I'd hoped.

She turned away quickly, surely realizing the heat in her cheeks. She wandered down the creek, grabbed a few rocks the color of a sunset, and skipped them across. I joined her, and we aimlessly skipped rocks in the clear, Arizona water together. We talked about where we were going to travel to. I explained it would take about seven hours to get to Los Angeles, California if we took I-10 and from Los Angeles to Salem, Oregon, fourteen hours. Two entire days of just driving. We would sleep tonight at the bed and breakfast, and wake up and get on the road by ten. We'd stay in a hotel in Los Angeles and try to get on the road at about seven or eight o'clock the next morning, and make it to Salem. And then from Salem to Vancouver was a seven-hour drive going on I-5. Vancouver was right on the border, and the closest we could be to it. But if we woke up early enough that day, it would be easy for us to get to a small town closer in to Canada. It seemed a bit melancholy to talk about the tail end of Elena and I's trip together, but I did not dwell on it very much. I had no need – there was a strong feeling in me that by the end of it, she would be mine.

When I had concluded explaining my plan to Elena she grimaced and then declared, desperation ringing in her words, "Can we not talk about the end of the trip? I've enjoyed this time, this sort of _road trip_. I'm no so sure I want it to come to an end just yet."

I grinned smugly. "My sentiments exactly."

Elena changed the subject when I noticed a hint of flush rising in her cheeks. "So what else do you want to show me?"

I let my gaze wander to the sky mysteriously, keeping Elena in suspense. When I looked back to her, she seemed to be in too much anticipation for me to keep it from her for too long. "Okay, okay! It's a very lovely place on a mesa. It has an incredible view of Sedona and the surrounding rocks. You'll like it if you liked this."

Elena smiled dazzlingly. I could see she was very excited to go to this place, and I was excited to show her. She would see the breathe-taking view and she would know I cared. I wouldn't be a monster or an ass if she didn't want me to be, and she would know it.

I checked my watch; it was almost three o'clock. It was about an hour and a half drive there, and we also had to hike back to the car. We would get there around 5:30 or 6:00, giving us the perfect amount of time to hike down to the perfect spot and watch the sunset. Everything would go as planned, everything would be _perfect_.

Elena and I hiked back to the car. We got in and I told her we had to drive straight there in order to get to the place in time. She was very compliant, as she wanted to see this correctly, as I did. We drove through the town and out of it, Elena looking baffled as we passed the town's welcome sign. She admired the landscape as we raced past it, awed by the craggy red rocks and prickly cacti. There weren't very many cars going toward the place we were; there were more going the opposite way, into Sedona. Elena noticed this too, and asked several times where exactly we were going. Each time I told her I either didn't answer or said she would find out soon enough. She seemed slightly disappointed by this but also very excited and expectant as she was anticipating something amazing, stunning – she knew I wouldn't be so secretive about it if it wasn't incredible. And she was right: the place I was going to take her was one of the more beautiful places I had ever been in my century and a half long lifetime.

We passed by the first indication of the place we were going: a large sign that read: Sedona Airport. I turned down Shrine Road though, away from the airport, passed a hanger where airplanes could be seen. Elena looked to me with narrowed eyes, but said nothing.

Soon we came to stopping point in the road. There were many trees and a trail could be seen cutting through the trees and down a steep path. I got out of the car, and noticed there was no one else in this spot. Elena got out of the car too, looking confused. She observed her surroundings as well, and then asked, "Where are we? What are we doing here?"

I nodded. And then motioned for her to follow me down the trail. It was very steep, but there was a clear landing further down, and I could see it from the trailhead. Elena followed, but repeated her two questions, this time with more force. I turned to her and finally replied with just a smile, and then continued down. Elena must have trusted me, because she followed me down without a word or complaint.

We finally got there and I turned to Elena before she could see the spectacular view this place offered. I held Elena's face in my hands softly and murmured, "This place is one of my favorites in the world."

I let her go and moved aside so she could pass me. When she did and then finally saw the view, she gasped.

From the Airport Mesa, there was a stunning view of the mountain-like red rocks, Coffee Pot Rock and Capitol Butte. The sun was setting fast behind them, painting the rocks every hue imaginable between red, orange, and brown. Sedona was seen below, and the cloudless, vibrant blue sky was rippled with hints of purple. It was a majestic view, more perfect than anything. No picture had done these rocks justice, and it was too beautiful to be taken in completely, which is why I loved revisiting these rocks, looking out onto them as the sun sunk behind them, expanding its very last rays of the day over them, painting them unbelievable colors. It almost didn't seem natural, as if someone had digitally altered one's vision when looking over this Sedona scenery. Nothing could be more lovely.

Except, maybe . . . Elena. The awe and admiration I saw in her dark eyes was ingenuous and true. It made me want to hold her delicately in my indestructible grip and kiss her little red flower of a mouth. I wanted to connect with her, I wanted us to be connected. I wanted the explosions I felt when I kissed her. I wanted her. I wanted Elena.

I couldn't stop watching her as she watched the sun sink below the horizon, and a wall of stars appear above us. Suddenly, it was very dark, and the vibrant red of the rocks dimmed. The moon hung in the sky, perfect and full, his companions, the stars, twinkling radiantly over us and Sedona. And then it was night. But this place, this view was as perfect at night as it was during the day.

* * *

Damon and Elena did not speak. They laid down on the mesa, their backs surely to be red when they rose, but they didn't care. Elena leaned into Damon, who had his arms opened to her. The soft hum of crickets and cicadas dusted the night air, providing a soundtrack, and the stars provided enough light to see each other's faces. Both believed the other looked angelic in the desert starlight, but said nothing.

They counted the stars, watched comets whiz by somewhere far off from the earth. The watched a shooting star too, as it hurtled passed the other stars, showing off its brilliance to the lookers down below on earth. Damon stole glances at Elena, and Elena stole glances at Damon. Neither felt ill at ease or uncomfortable though; nothing had ever felt more right than to just be with each other, counting the stars. They both knew what they wanted from the other though, which is why they would inconspicuously pass a glance at the other. They wanted contact, more contact than just to be wrapped in each other's arms.

Elena was the first to speak up about her desire. She murmured softly, "Damon. I can finally see you're right here beside me, as you should, and I don't want you to let go. But . . . I desperately need you . . . now . . ."

Damon gazed into her eyes so intensely that she felt as though she had said something wrong. He gauged her expression, be sure he could trust her. But when he saw nothing except that he _could_, he replied in an equally low voice, "Elena, I think . . . I need you too." It seemed very unsure when Damon said it, but both of them knew it was true.

And then their lips met, and the stars above them lit up like fireworks. It was too good to even be real, but it was. And Elena realized which brother she was right for. And Damon realized that this girl, only this girl and not her doppelganger, was right for him.

So, under the moon and beneath the stars, Damon and Elena fell in love.

**AWHS?**

** I loved writing this chapter. Do you guys LIIIIIKE it? You better! Because I do (;**

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	9. Inundated

**Yeah, that's right. I'm back, bitches. And I am your new proxy. Review, ladies and gentlemen (;**

** It's been such a long time because I had school. And a life. Both those things COMBINED can prove to be very time-consuming. But I'm here again because I was inspired once more.**

**So, like the Season Two premiere, let us pick up where we last left off, shall we?**

_My love has concrete feet . . . My love's an iron ball . . . Wrapped around your ankles . . . Over the waterfall . . ._

It was 8:04 when the _thud_ of a car trunk being slammed shut woke me up. Not that I hadn't been going in and out of sleep since the bright, fiery Arizona sun rose just behind the beautiful red rocks, shading the sweet little town of Sedona.

I inhaled sharply, the lovely scent of the desert filling my nose, awakening my senses completely. My eyes squinted against the harsh sunlight of the morning, and I looked for the source of the sound that had awoken me. I traveled up the short, narrow pathway and found Damon at the trunk of this car, surveying the area.

I was nervous to say anything or mention the previous night. I only waited for Damon to notice me, which took less than a second. He smiled at me, his acknowledgement, and then said in that velvety voice that was lathered with the utmost confidence, "Good morning, Elena."

I beamed, grinning ear to ear. "Good morning," I replied. "What's on the agenda for today?"

His smirk was irresistible. "Well we have get on the road right now, hop on I-10 and make it to Los Angeles before your _boyfriend_ has an aneurism." Damon said the word "boyfriend" in such a disdainful, derivative way that made me cringe. And then frown.

"Stefan called?"

"Yes, he did, with a clear warning to stay away from you."

I ignored the second part of his statement. "Any news about Katherine?"

"Apparently she's made dozens of advances. She's quite angry _and _now she knows all about you. Stefan said he hadn't seen her the past few days." However, he stared deeply into my eyes, searching, instead of hustling me anywhere. He narrowed his eyes and then asked me sternly, "Elena, didn't you hear me say that Stefan warned me in a very intimidating manner to stay away from you?"

I sighed. "Yes, I did. But I didn't want to."

Damon cocked an eyebrow. "Oh, really?"

I could only roll my eyes in response. I turned away from him and hopped into the passenger's seat.

Damon sped away from Airport Mesa, going at a blinding speed. I had to clutch the sides of my seat as we zoomed onto I-10 in a matter of minutes. Once we had merged onto the gigantic freeway, he slowed down. I threw him a dirty look and Damon only shrugged.

I wanted to talk to Damon about what had happened last night.

Nothing horrible or adulterous had happened, but I was still tied to Stefan, and Stefan would be angry if he knew. Waves of guilt sailed over me, lapping up on my shores. I loved Stefan so much, and I knew that he loved me more than anything. Stefan and I were near perfect for each other. We fit together so well, two cogs meshing together impeccably. It was _right_, there wasn't a kink in our relationship. We never disagreed, we never fought over things, and if we did, it was quickly resolved by one of us submitting because we just loved the other too much to argue. It was always so _orderly _and neat, everything fitting together nicely, everything moving and flowing together without a hitch. It was pleasant for a while, not having to worry about vampire boyfriend drama. But I was just realizing how actually, the entire thing was very _boring_. There wasn't any true passion. Of course there was a fair amount of passion, but it was like the basic, instinctual sort of passion where you fight and then _have to_ have each other's bodies the next second. That was a beautiful sort of passion. The passion Stefan and I had was only okay, only so-so.

However, with_ Damon_ . . . there was the deepest sort of passion. There had always been a very instant connection. And I constantly wanted to through him down and he connected to him in more ways that one, only hoping that he could feel the same. But because of this profound passion, I did know he felt the same, and it was such a magnificent feeling. This sort of beautiful infatuation was a basic of all humans, yet it was one of the hardest to come by in the entire universe. What point was there in wasting it? I had to utilize this fervor, the ardor that people rarely ever found in their lives. I wouldn't be doing justice to all the people in the world who only settled instead of finding this amazing passion. I had to take advantage of a Damon for the people who settled for a Stefan.

I glanced over at Damon, who was concentrated on navigating our way through the masses of traffic. One look, and I knew the passion was there. It was there, smoldering beneath the surface, slow burning embers and a blaze brighter than the sun. It was a spectacular conflagration. But then it dawned on me: this was a conflagration that only the lucky people experienced, but it was also the sort cursed people experienced. This sort of passion and slow burning fire could be a wild and beautiful thing. But it could also be the sort of thing that could leave me covered entirely in third degree burns. It was dangerous to play with a love so heated and passionate. But it could be worth it in the end.

Damon swiveled toward me, and I realized I had been staring at him intensely for several minutes. His eyes flashed as he asked, "Have you zoned out completely, Elena?"

It seemed like a rude thing to say, but I could see the concern in his blue eyes. I smiled sweetly and answered, "Yes."

"You never daze off like that."

"Only with you around."

The possibility of third degree burns was so worth the possibility of having ignited passion. It would set my entire life on fire, and that was worth it to me anyway.

But there was always the manner of Stefan. Poor Stefan. He would be overcome with grief. It's not like I wanted to hurt him or like I was getting some sick sort of pleasure from hurting the one who loved me so. I knew it was all for the best though. I didn't want to settle, and it shouldn't be that way for Stefan either. He deserved as much passion as I did. I just wasn't the right girl to give it to him; he needed to find a better source. A source that seemed almost handpicked. As with Damon for me.

Seven hours seemed to fly by with Damon. Before we knew it, it was already three in the afternoon and we were already driving through Los Angeles, searching for a cheap hotel to stay in for the night. I had never been to L.A., much less California, and seeing the sights I had so often seen in movies and TV shows was exciting. And I had the rest of the afternoon to explore it with Damon, who promised that he knew his way around this city. It wasn't even that I was going with an experienced tour guide and getting everything out of the city that I could, but instead that my experienced tour guide was _Damon_!

Who I was falling for.

The words poured down on me like rays of sunshine, warming me up inside and out. I was falling for Damon. I was falling _so hard_, harder than I'd ever fallen for anyone before. It was exhilarating, igniting my life with brilliance and zeal. It was such a lovely thing. It was like falling in love for the very first time, maybe better.

My excitement soon slowed when I thought this. It felt as though I was falling in love for the first time . . . was I?

It seemed like a stupid question, but I allowed my imagination to run away with it anyway. Had I ever truly been in love with Stefan?

No, that was completely absurd. Of course I'd been in love with Stefan. I might even still be. What the hell was I talking about?

The love was just different. One was stagnant and traditional. The other, totally on fire!

I smiled to myself and retreated from the car as soon as Damon pulled up to a Hilton Hotel. He grabbed my bags from the trunk and he walked together from the parking lot to the lobby of the hotel. Damon and checked us into one room and hopefully one bed, and we went up to the third floor to unload my things.

We made it to the room. I passed by a mirror and caught my reflection from the corner of my head. I turned back and surveyed myself completely, gasping. I looked terrible! I needed a shower and to reapply my makeup as soon as possible. I ran to my bags and shuffled through my things in order to find my makeup bag. I think sprinted to the bathroom. I saw Damon's confused eyes watching me as I hurried. I couldn't ignore him. I turned to him before entering the bathroom and asked, "Why didn't you tell me I looked so _disgusting_ today?"

His eyebrows pulled together and his eyes narrowed, limiting my view of his undying blue irises. "Because you didn't," he answered me. "You always look beautiful, Elena."

I was blindsided. Beautiful?

I stepped toward him. "You think I'm beautiful?"

"Of course I think you're beautiful. But it's not just your looks, even though your looks are very gorgeous. You're kind and caring. And your smile could light up a room. Everything about you is absolutely stunning. Why wouldn't I acknowledge your beauty?"

I was overcome, and I wanted to tell Damon that I believed I was falling for him. But somehow, the words escaped me, and I couldn't find them in my jumbled mouth. The only two words that tumbled out, thankfully in the correct order, were: "Thank you."

He smiled. But he seemed wounded.

I slipped into the bathroom, not breaking his stare and hopped into an hour-long shower.

* * *

I heard the water squeak on and Elena lurch into the shower. She seemed as if assailed when I spoke to her directly from my very inner and quite personal thoughts.

Everything I had spoken had been true, and it always had been. From the moment I saw her I thought she was beautiful. From the moment I saw _Katherine_, I thought Katherine was beautiful as well. It only made sense to think Elena was beautiful too. But after being with Elena as closely as I had been, I realized she was so much more beautiful than Katherine. Elena cared for everyone, she was so warm and happy. She was the sort of person someone is suppose to surround oneself with. And all I wanted to do was surround myself with Elena.

But she seemed so ambushed when I told her how beautiful I knew she was. Was she unhappy with my statement, not returning my feelings? Or was she merely not expecting it? I hoped for the second one, but braced myself for the first one as I heard the water shut off. It had been an entire hour that I'd been pondering this and Elena had been showering.

Elena retreated from the bathroom, the steam from the shower escaping from behind like ghosts. Her hair was dark and wet, and she didn't have any makeup on. She was breathtaking, absolutely stunning. She was at her prettiest in her most natural state.

Her eyes met mine and they danced playfully. "What are_ you_ staring at?" she asked in a lighthearted fashion.

I smirked. She grabbed some clothes and returned to the ghost-filled bathroom. She later left the bathroom in a pair of jean shorts and a blue T-shirt, her hair dried and her face full of makeup. A dab of disappointment welled inside me, but I didn't think too much about it because Elena always looked beautiful, I didn't have to worry.

* * *

After an afternoon of exploring the strange and amazing sights of Los Angeles. Damon and I decided to meet up with an old friend of his, who was a vampire. He assured me he'd do anything to protect me if anything happened. I believed him.

We met at a small but overly crowded bar and restaurant. Damon and I wove our way through the throng of the people. Their voices and the voices of the football game spectators on the different TVs were deafening. We finally squeezed our way through to a table where a single man sat alone with a beer in hand. When he turned to us, his face lit up and he greeted Damon. I was introduced, but I wasn't in the mood to be cordial. There was a strange feeling in the pit of my stomach, churning.

Damon and the man talked idly for a while, drinking and laughing, but I didn't want to drink or join in the conversation. I kept a weary eye on the large crowd. I wasn't sure why I was so keen on looking out for myself, but I was. This growing feeling of anxiety and sense of danger that lingered deep in my stomach, boiling and churning, was somehow a warning. It had to be. It was so strong, ominous and foreboding. How could I ignore such a powerful message as this one?

Maybe I was overreacting though. Damon asked if I was okay when his friend ordered a round of beers, and I nodded. I told him about the strange sense of danger I felt and his forehead crinkled. He said he would look out. This calmed me. I had a beer.

As I nonchalantly sipped my drink, the chatter around me only white noise, I saw someone out of the corner of my eye at the bar. She seemed _extremely _familiar, so I turned to get a better look. Her back was turned to me, but it seemed like a back I'd seen dozens of times before. Her face shifted a fraction and I squinted to get a better look. But I first blinked, and when I opened my eyes again, she was gone.

I thought of the glimpse of the face I had seen.

It seemed like a face I'd seen so often, from the glance of it I saw: tan skin, sloped nose, dark eyes and hair. So familiar . . .

I gasped in recognition, my face transfixed with the horror of the realization.

Damon pulled himself away from his conversation. His eyes flashed. "Elena, what is it?" he asked in a low voice though I knew the other vampire beside us could hear all too well.

"Someone . . . she . . . _Katherine_!" I hissed with fear.

"_What_?" Damon jumped up, and grabbed my arm roughly, herding me out of the bar, leaving his friend behind. I didn't hear his friend say or ask anything as we left abruptly.

It was very dark outside when we reached the parking lot, but Damon had a very firm grip on me. He sounded as though he was mumbling to himself: "_Katherine_? _Why_?"

Damon fished the car keys from his pocket and unlocked the door. He yanked the door open but as soon as he did, there was a flash and the door had slammed shut again. Damon pulled me to him, protecting me as the flash passed by us again. "Katherine?" he cried.

The flash stopped in front of us, revealing to us Katherine, sleek and dangerous, identical to me. I was astounded. Her laughter was an innocent tinkle, but I heard such malicious intent behind it. She smirked evilly and said, "Hello, Damon. It's been an awfully long time."

Damon didn't move, his eyes fixed on her, watching her every move, ready to pounce if need be. "Katherine," he greeted her evenly.

"You're not giving me the cold shoulder, are you, Damon?" Her voice was so mocking and so cruel. She turned her attention to me, all traces of mocking and unkind playfulness vanishing leaving only her malignant intent. "You," she addressed me. "You're Elena, aren't you?" Her smile was sickeningly sweet. "I won't hurt you. I'm merely fascinated by you. You truly are identical to me, Isobel wasn't kidding. And you're in love with _my_ Stefan, is this correct?"

My mouth went dry, fear rising in me, heightening and conquering all of my senses. "You can have Stefan," Damon spoke for me.

Katherine pouted. "Well he told me I couldn't." Her eyes flashed to me. "He was already taken."

And in that miniscule fraction of a second that proceeded, Katherine lunged at me, grappling at my neck, her face the face of a demon ready to kill. She bit down and before I knew what she'd done, a pain stronger than I could imagine coursed through me. I screamed, the agony amplified by every passing second that Katherine's teeth ripped through my flesh and veins to find the treasure they hid: blood.

Then she ripped from me by Damon, who threw her clear across the lot. I fell to the ground, my hand to my neck. The blood was pouring out, pumping relentlessly, spilling across the asphalt. The pain had subsided, but just barely. I was still in excrutiating agony.

It consumed me, and my hearing began to fade in and out. The corners of my vision became black, and I couldn't tell when or if I was conscious anymore. Far away, I saw Damon and Katherine fighting. They were mostly only blurs that paused long enough to see their defined shapes. The man inside joined, but seemed to be fighting _against_ Damon. I wanted to help him so badly. I would've done whatever I could. But there was nothing I could do but fade away on the cool concrete.

What seemed like hours of darkness finally, a light came to me. It was white and blinding. The light of a hospital room.

Steady beeping filled my ears as well as the scribble of a pen somewhere nearby. The room came into focus. I saw a doctor standing in the corner of my vision. I turned slightly. But that slight turn caused bolts of pain to shoot through my neck and I cried out. The doctor turned away from whatever he was scribbling. He crouched to my eyelevel and the pain in my neck subsided. My hand found the gauze and explored the tender area.

The doctor smiled. "Hello, Elena. Good to see you awake."

I moaned and then mumbled, "How long was I out?"

"Well someone found you lying beside a car, gushing blood, around 12:45 last night. And it's around," he checked his wristwatch, "3:30. So you've been out for about fifteen hours. You were out for a while. The blood loss was unimaginable though. You're lucky you were found when you were, or you would have died from the blood loss."

I nodded; short zaps of pain resonated throughout my spine and skull as I did so. "That is lucky."

He smiled. And then a voice from farther away cried with such worry, such anxiety and caring: "Elena?"

I half expected it to be Stefan. But I was overcome with bliss when I saw Damon's perfect face.

"Damon!" I cried, my voice cracking as tears streamed down my face. I didn't know why I was silently crying, the tears falling seamlessly. I must have been in such prime bliss at seeing his face.

"Elena!" he cried again. He looked over me. I then realized I had all manner of tubes and needles come in and protruding out of me. I must have looked horrible.

Despite knowing I must look awful, I mumbled, my voice scratchy and low, "I'm fine."

Damon snorted. "This is _not_ fine. Elena, I'm so sorry –"

I cut him off, "Damon. You couldn't have stopped her. Yes, you're very strong, but she's older than you. You couldn't have stopped her."

He nodded, but his eyes filled with sadness. He came forward, and cradled my head in his hands gingerly. He kissed my forehead. "I'm so, so sorry, Elena." He pulled away and then gazed into my eyes deeply, gauging my thoughts. However, I was hypnotized by his eyes, and could only allow him to traverse my mind, not that I minded anyway. "Elena," he finally started, "He doesn't love you like I love you."

His words were the most powerful thing I had ever overcome. My breathing became jagged. "What?"

"Stefan doesn't love you like I love you."

I was inundated with happiness. "You love me?"

"I love you."

Embattled by ecstasy, besieged with harmony. Absolutely snowed under. "I love you too."

We shared a smile meant for only us two.

**Yay(:**

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**Ahh, it's good to be back :D**


	10. Shock

**Hello. Sorry for the wait. Here you are! Don't forget your reviews!**

_I'm so heavy, heavy . . . Heavy in your arm . . . I'm so heavy, heavy . . . So heavy in your arms . . ._

"You ought to know, I think of you all the time. I always have. Even when we're not together."

"You always have?"

"Yes. From the first moment I laid eyes on you."

Damon and I were lying in my hospital bed together, listening to the steady melody of a monitor's beeping and the sound of our heartbeats. Damon recounted how he had escaped from Katherine to me. I listened intently, enthralled by the story of his strength.

Damon explained that as he was about to be beaten by Katherine and her minion, he fell to the ground and thought that he would be staked. But someone saved him. Someone came from nowhere and escaped from Katherine, taking Damon with him. Damon remembered the rescuer saying something to him before he left, but he couldn't remember. When he had finished his story, I whispered against his black shirt, "Thank you. For trying to save me."

Damon smirked the way he always did. My heart fluttered. Before this trip, I hadn't much minded how confident he was. It made me love him more. "Anything for you," he replied.

"So you really don't know who your savior is?"

"No. I remember thinking I knew him, but I'm not so sure. I don't remember his face at all. I barely remember anything from that. Katherine was so strong. If that person who saved me hadn't been around, they would have staked me, I'm sure of it."

Damon laid a hand upon mine. I hadn't realized it, but I had clutched his shirt tightly in my fist at the mention of his death.

I contemplated how suddenly attached I was to Damon. Of course, this road trip with him had opened my eyes to how similar Damon and I were, as well as how Damon _really_ was. I realized that perhaps, in the back of my mind, I'd always known Damon for who he truly was, but allowed his mask to distract me. Damon wore a mask, a very prominent and off-putting mask, which diverted me and made me believe Damon's mask was really he in his truest form. But being so close to Damon, being with him those past days had me comprehending that, unlike most people, when I had first met Damon, I didn't only see the mask. I must have seen him, truly and purely, but was quickly distracted by that damn mask of his, like so many others had been. I liked Damon without the mask though. I knew he didn't like others viewing his vulnerability because like so many others, he was afraid of getting hurt. This was such a human fear, something you wouldn't think a strong, seemingly impenetrable vampire such as Damon would experience. Then again, this is why he wore the mask. In fact, he was actually very penetrable, and I had permeated his shell, and seen him for what he truly, absolutely was.

I continued to think about this as I not only slid further down into Damon's arms but also slid way down into sleep. I fell into a very deep sleep, the type without dreams. I barely stirred at all as I slept so soundly, waking only once. It was very murky when I did wake that once; I likened it to rising from deep, black waters, and into a stormy sky. There was thunder: shouting. There was lighting and flashing lights. Nothing was clear; I couldn't even be sure it was real, rather than just a dream. My vision was blurred and mostly obscured by the blinding fluorescent lightbulbs of the hospital. However, I could make out two, tall, most likely male figures, standing over me. I was not afraid though, for I knew they were not facing me and were not looking to do something to do me. I could see they were confronting each other. I could hear them conversing as well, but I couldn't make out what they were saying very well despite the fact that they were yelling at each other very loudly. They were fighting. As I drifted in and out of repose, I could at least see they were plainly shouting and arguing with each other. They flailed their arms and made exaggerated gestures with their hands. I wanted to ask them why they were arguing, but I also wanted them to be quiet so I could sleep. I couldn't find my voice though, so I settled down into the recesses of slumber and didn't rise from it for several more hours.

Soon, those hours had passed, and my eye cracked open slowly. It was daytime, and I was alone in the room. I glanced around as I stretched. I wasn't sure what to do, for I saw no one. I worried for only a moment: where could Damon have gone? I wasn't sure if he would leave me; I thought he would stay. I noticed the needle that me connected to a long pole with wheels from which hung a bag via a vein in my left hand. I figured as long as I took the pole with the bag hanging from it with me, I could walk around and look for Damon. So, I took the pole in my left hand, making sure not to squeeze and make my hand feel uncomfortable, and got out of the hospital bed. I left my room and wandered around the hallways, which were completely deserted. I passed by a few rooms that had patients in them, but they never looked to their open doorways and noticed me simply wandering about. I felt like a ghost as I shuffled down the empty hallways, unnoticed by anyone. It was an odd concept, but it was cathartic in some way because I wasn't in danger. No one was after me because no one was even looking at me as I hobbled through the halls.

I was going down a particularly long hallway that seemed to end in a sharp turn to the left. As I approached this curve in the hall, someone else rounded the hallway's turn at a brisk pace and ran into me.

"Oh! I am so sorry, I –" I began, but stopped mid-sentence when I looked up and saw the face of the man I had run in to. "_Stefan?_"

Stefan looked down at me, less shocked than I. He smiled his usual half smile, expecting me to ask what he was doing there, but I could only gape as I looked into the face of the man I had once loved.

Then I realized it: I didn't love Stefan anymore. And more than that, we were supposed to be dating at the time, and I was _cheating_ on him. With his own brother! Pangs of guilt hit me like bullets. I stood there, gaping, the realization of what I was doing to these two brothers washing over me, a huge tidal wave that filled me up and drowned me.

Stefan continued to look at me, crossing his arms. Finally, when I had said nothing, he merely greeted me, a hint of contempt in his tone, "Hello, Elena."

I continued to gape as I met his eyes. "_Stefan_?"

He nodded.

"What are you even . . . _doing_ here?" I asked, every fold of shock resonating throughout my voice.

Stefan smiled wider at me, disdain spreading in his face, as he replied, "Just wanted to check up on you."

"I . . . don't know what to say."

"Clearly."

* * *

I rounded the corner of the hallway I had been hurrying down and came face to face with Stefan's back. Just beyond him, I could see an absolutely shocked Elena. Oh, no. I knew that confrontation couldn't be a good thing.

Elena's eyes met mine just beyond Stefan. She gazed at me sternly, worriedly. Stefan turned and met my eyes as well. His expression was filled with hidden scorn. I was temporarily speechless. "Um . . . maybe we should all go talk somewhere," I suggested.

Stefan nodded, and Elena led us back to her hospital room. She gingerly retreated back to her bed, and I moved and adjusted the pole to which her IV was connected. Stefan observed and scrutinized the way Elena and I interacted as we entered the room. I made a painful effort to remain cold and composed towards Elena as we all discussed the things that had taken place.

As soon as we had all settled, Elena immediately spoke the first word, saying, "I'm sorry. I know this entire thing is all my fault."

Stefan shrugged. He crossed his arms and with hidden contempt, replied, "It is. Elena, what the hell were you thinking? I thought . . . I thought you loved me."

Elena looked down at her hands, utterly ashamed. I felt so very guilty. I added, "It's not completely Elena's fault. It's mine as well. I had been . . . coveting her for a long time. And when I even got a hint that she could ever return the feelings, I could only fall truly, deeply, madly in love with her. I'm sorry, Stefan. I know what women have done to us before. I shouldn't have let this happen, but I couldn't help it. I love her. And I've loved her for a very long time now."

Elena looked to me with absolute admiration. Love swam in her eyes, but I couldn't look back into them. Instead, I turned to Stefan. Who seemed completely calm and collected on the inside, but knowing my brother, I could see the torture and pain that eddied just below the surface. I felt guilt for him. Guilt for stealing his girl. Just as he had stolen mine a century and a half ago. "Stefan," I started. "The good in this is that now you can have Katherine without worrying about me."

"I don't want Katherine, Damon. I want Elena. I love her more than I could ever love Katherine," Stefan answered, anger finally bubbling to the surface, overriding his composed façade.

"You don't know that. Maybe you were always made for Katherine."

"I am not made to be with some sadistic, manipulative _bitch _that I once loved a century ago, Damon! I'm made for Elena. I want Elena, only _Elena_." There was such anguish in his voice that it caused even more guilt to rise in my throat.

"Stefan, please," Elena warned in a severe voice. "Both of you, calm down!"

"Elena!" Stefan cried.

"Oh, Elena, _Elena_!" a tinkling voice wafted from the doorway of Elena's hospital room. "Please. Are you Salvatore brothers really arguing over a girl _again_?" Everyone turned at the sound of the voice and immediately filled with shock when everyone saw Katherine, nonchalantly resting in the threshold. "Oh, don't look so surprised." She mocked as everyone gazed at her, stunned.

Katherine sauntered into the room. Everyone else seemed to be holding their breath. "Katherine," Stefan murmured, acknowledging her.

"Hello, Stefan," she replied playfully with a giggle. She tore herself away from him though, addressing everyone collectively: "So don't I get a say in this?"

I rolled my eyes. "A say in _what_?" I hissed aggressively.

"In how everyone is being . . . divvied up. I think I want a brother too." She glanced at Stefan who ignored her.

There was silence.

OOOOOooooooOOOOOooooo.

Okay, yeah, I know. I'm not exactly sure where this is going either. Or AM I? Hehe, you'll see. Doesn't mean you shouldn't review! Drop me some reviews, guys :D


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